Life, 1886-10-28 · page 13 of 16
Life — October 28, 1886 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Cartoon Analysis: "At Scissors at Mills" This page is primarily **humorous anecdotes** rather than political cartoons. The "Sizing a Man Up" collection presents brief satirical observations about American life and human nature. Key jokes: 1. A bartender claims he can judge customers' character without questions—when asked his fee, he reveals he's simply guessing, undercutting his own claim 2. An Irishman evades prohibition laws by claiming whiskey is for "soaking roots," then admits it's for loosening his tongue 3. A scoundrel justifies embezzlement as profitable because he can negotiate reduced restitution and return home as a "smart" businessman—mocking institutional corruption and re-election of compromised officials 4. A woman at a theater refuses to remove a fashionable tall hat; the man's strategic solution (wearing his own hat) shames her into compliance—commentary on social obstruction and female fashion excess 5. A youth claims laziness isn't inherited, sarcastically suggesting his father hoarded it—plays on paternity and inherited traits The humor targets social hypocrisy, Irish stereotypes, corruption, fashion absurdity, and family dynamics. These are largely social rather than political satires.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
- LIFE - SIZING A MAN UP. “WHEN a man orders whisky, ” said Dumley to the bartender, “(do you ask him if he wants ten or fifteen cent goods ?” “No. I've been in the business long enough to size a man up with- out asking questions.” “I suppose you do become more or less familiar with human nature,” remarked Dumley, as he selected a clove. ‘t How much do I owe you 2” “Ten cents, please.” — New York Sun. THE town of the Dedham is under prohibition law, apothecaries alone being permitted to sell alcoholic stimulants, |The other day a son of the Emerald Isle entered a drug store there, and, taking a bot- tle from his pocket, asked for a quart of whisky. ‘The salesman asked to what use it was to be put, and the reply was: ‘To soak roots in it.” The order was filled, and the clerk, after handing over the bottle and its contents, inquired, in a conversational manner, “What kind of roots are you going to soak?” Pocketing the bottle, the customer said: ‘ The roots of my tongue, be jabers."" — Argonaut Storyette. “I pon’r see,” observed Boggs, as he leaned back in his chair, ‘how any man of sense can be led to embezzle $50,000 or $100,000 and skip the country! He is disgraced, his future ruined, and what good can the money do him?” “You don't take the right view of it,” replied Stebbins. ‘Why ?” ‘The idea, my dear sir, is to settle for half the sum stolen and return home to be looked upon as a smart man and re- elected president of a rival institution."— Wall Street News. 265 OnE Gordon, a vocalist of the last century, rashly accused Handel of accompanying badly, and added that he would jump upon the harp- sichord and smash it if the composer did not change his style.‘ Let me know vhen you will do dat,” said the Saxon master, ‘and I vill adverdize it. I am sure more beoble vill come to see you shump den vill come to hear you sing !"—Ex, A GENTLEMAN at a recent matinee at a theatre was seated behind a * lady wearing one of the fashionable tall hats. ‘‘ Excuse me, madam, but if you do not remove your hat I shall not be able to see anything.” The lady ignored him. ‘Excuse me, madam, but if you do not remove your hat something unpleasant will happen.” The lady ignored him again. The gentleman put on his ownjhat. Loud cries of ‘Take off that hat!” ‘* Take off that hat!” from the audi- ence behind, The lady thought the cries refer to her hat, and quickly removed it. ‘‘ Thank you, madam !” — Ex, THE ‘‘bull” is evidently not confined to the Emerald Isle. Thus the proprietor of a western hotel mentions the following advantage among many others enumerated in his advertisement : ‘ Is patronized by the elite of the aristocracy, including the late Emperor Napoleon and other distinguished personages.” — London Globe. ‘A YOUNG man charged with being lazy was asked if he took it from his father. ‘‘I think not,” was the reply; ‘* father’s-got all the lazi- ness he ever had.” — Ex. THE trustees of a church at Akron, O., presented a member with a bill for twenty-seven years’ pew rent the other day, and he has gone to law about it. He says he distinctly remembers paying something twenty-six years ago, and he thinks it was a whole quarter's rent, which should now be deducted. — Detroit Free Press. INTROSPECTION, WE received a basket of grapes the other day from a subscriber, with the request, ‘Please notice this on your inside.” We have Just Published. THE ROMANCE OF THE MOON. Pen and Ink Drawings, illustrating a Quaint Tale of the Origin of the Dew. By J. A. Mitchell (the Editor of Lirz.) ramo, illuminated cover, $1.00. A FORTNIGHT IN HEAVEN. An Unconventional Romance. By Harold Brydges. xamo, $1.25. KLAUS BEWER’S. WIFE. From the German of Paul Lindau, by Clara S. Fleishman, x6mo. Leisure Hour’ Series, $1.00; Leisure Season Series, so cents. Henry Holt & Co., 29 W. 28d St., N.Y. LUNDBORG'S AND LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts., and 181 Broadway, near Cortland St., NEW YORK. Palmer House, Chicago. done so.— New Haven News. LADIES’ TAILOR. HABIT MAKER and HATTER oF 19 EAST 21st STREET, NEW YORK, CELEBRATED HATS GR SQHCITS a9 Inspection of his Fall Importations in ‘Woolens and Fabrics Selected from Leading Manufacturers in Euro- pean markets, Designs and Styles in Novelties certain to lease are now to beseen yy patrons and ladies who require a Perfect Fit 9r4 Chestnut St., Phila, ae Saeed Perfume Boston Herald. To judge from the pictures of Mrs. Langtry in the New York papers, she'll have to rely solely on her talent as an actress this trip.— ckets, Coats, Gowns, raps,’ etc,, etc, for the Drive,’ House or Street. Rune Hasrrs Mave or Fauttirss Fir, EDENIA LUNDBORG'S Second Series. “LIFE’S VERSES!” ‘Composed of the best poems, selected from ‘* Life," beautifully bound and illustrated. Cover in colors. The daintiest book ever published. Price, $1.50, postaxe paid. Also, “THE GOOD THINGS OF LIFE.” Price, $2.50 Send remittance by check to order of + LIFE - 1155 BROADWAY, NEW YORK. CROSB Rhenish Cologne. °S VITALIZED PHOSPHITES. | Strengthens the intellect, restores lost functions, builds up worn-out nerves, promotes good digestion, cures all weaknesses and nervousness, 56 Wust 25TH Street, New York. For Sate sy Druccists, or Malt, $1.00, comicbooks.com