Life — August 26, 1886 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE SOCIAL FAVORITE. ES, he has a massive forehead, and a manner debonnaire, And his lips seem framed to utter little trifles light as air. He’s an artist without question, and is bound to make his mark In whatever line he chooses his fine talents to embark ; He has such command of language, and his smile so very sweet Every damozel entrances, who declare it is a treat To keep still and simply listen to whate’er he has to say When discussing any topic, whether grave it is or gay. What's his name and his profession? To what tastes does he incline? Well, he’s chiefly known, my lady, as the ‘‘ Slugger of the Nine.” | * * * T isa strange and pathetic fact that, in spite of their cul- ture, their analytic philosophy, their pantheistic religion, their esoteric Buddhism, and their baked beans, they do know how to build yachts in Boston. * * * ENERAL FITZ-JOHN PORTER, by grace of Con- gress, has been promoted to a Colonelcy in the Army. If we should get into a war with Mexico, and Col. Porter | should fight well, he might rise still further to the rank of a High-Private. * * * HE legend that a swarm of bees once alighted on the lips of the infant Plato, seems plausible. Many a word of wisdom, a Concord philosopher tells us, | fell from Plato stung. - * * * HE lockout by the cigar manufacturers has ended, as we expected it would end, in smoke. * * * DAILY paper, on the morning after Mr. Irving’s dinner, | remarked that the health of the actor was enthusiastic- ally drunk. It is to be hoped that Mr. Irving confined this condition to his health, * * * CORRESPONDENT of the 77zbune wants Mr. Ivins indicted for “ criminal coquetry.” We never suspected that Mr. Ivins was a giddy flirt, but if he is he should be summarily dealt with. * * * HE Borgia of the nineteenth century may well be called a summer villain from Somerville. * * * HY not compromise with Mexico by cutting off Cut- ting’s head, and letting the Mexicans keep that, after restoring the remainder of the saintly martyr to his sorrowing neighbors in Texas? The whole matter could be thus settled without shedding any innocent gore. | who can write so valuable a volume. | allow envy to obscure our generosity ; we not only unquali- A PROPOSITION. E received, some months ago, a copy of a little work by Mr. Adair Welcker, of Sacramento, California, entitled, “ Romer, King of Norway, and Other Dramas.” We have a dim recollection that a notice for Mr. Welcker’s book was desired, but as it was a very small volume, and worth, as it seemed to us, not more than one-half of a seventy-one-cent dollar, we were somewhat remiss in the matter, and overlooked the author's request that we should mould such public opinion as came within our reach in his behalf. A recent advertisement in a contemporary, wherein the author offers to dispose of the few remaining copies in his possession for $50 each, recalled the book to our mind. We | believed that a book worth $50 must have something in it, | and a perusal of the work confirmed that belief. Mr. Welcker’s modest prefatory comments upon his work are alone worth $49.75, and the rest of the book if sold by the pound would realize the additional sum demanded by the author. Among these comments are the following: ‘These works are placed in book form in order that the people of a future age may have the opportunity to open their mouths with won- der at the utterances of a very ordinary dead man. The plays are written for the few in this age who are too great for prejudice, and for the people of an age in the future when the past is not envied — when envy of the writer shall have ceased with his death. As it is an unpardonable crime against the vast mass of men for one person in his own lifetime to excel the rest in anything, although others will excel him in other respects, I expect to meet with strong | condemnation for these works. So let it be—it is the law of nature. That he is a true student of human nature this Sacra- mento Shakespeare, as Mr. Welcker assures us he has been called, shows in his remarks on the envy of the age. Even we, in this little office of ours, thousands of miles away from the gifted genius of the Pacific Coast, feel envious of a man But we shall not fiedly rejoice in Mr. Welcker’s success, but also desire to con- tribute further to his well being and distinctly offer to let him have back the sumptuous fifty-dollar work which he so reck- lessly squandered on us for fifty per cent. off for cash. If the gentleman will accept likewise. some well meant advice, we would tell him that when he next publishes a volume to be circulated among men who are too great for prejudice he should get up an Edition de Luxe limited to one copy and drop it overboard. We wish to add that if there should happen to be any Milwaukee Miltons, Dakota Dickenses or Weehawken Wordsworths who are desirous of sending us free copies of $50 volumes, they need feel no diffidence in so doing, pro- vided expressage or postage is prepaid. J. K. Bangs. Inte? comicbooks.com