Life — August 19, 1886 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

- LIFE: FAT SEISERS AT NvLLy A WAG, sauntering along a Boston street the other day, says the Boston Post, was accosted by a man who stammered,as follows : ‘Can you t-t-tell me where T may g-g-get some g-g-g-g- good t-t-tin t-t-t-tacks?” ‘ Certainly,” replied the wag. ‘* You turn down this street on your left two blocks, then turn again two blocks to your left, and again two blocks to your left, and that brings you to the best hardware shop in town, where you'll be sure to find them.” The stammerer continued his way. The wag, walking down the street two blocks, entered the aforesaid hardware shop and proceeded us follows: ‘*Have you any g-g-good t-t-tin t-t-t-t-tacks?” “Yes, sir,” said the obliging shop- man, producing his best after some rummaging. ‘Are you sure th-th-these are g-g-good ones?” ‘‘ Yes, sir, the best that ate made.” ‘Are th-th-the heads g-g-g-good and strong?” “Yes, sir.” ‘‘ Have they g-g-got g-g-g-g-good s-s-s-s-sharp p-p- p-p-points?” ‘Yes, sir.” Well, you p-p-p-please s-s-s-sit on them till I come back will you?” Exit rapidly. Presently the unlucky stammerer, having described a square of two blocks, arrived at the hardware shop, and entering, asked innocently : ‘* Have you any g-g-g-good t-t-tin t-t-t-tacks ’’——“‘ Get out of here,” etc., etc., etc.—Zx. THE Philadelphia News says that Miss Cleveland’s description of Chicago, the home of her future literary life, as ‘‘ the Venice of the Western Adriatic,” will be a revelation to Chicagoans, who have long thought Venice the goddess of love.—Ex. 114 One of the banners displayed at Mr. Gladstone’s reception in Edinburgh the other day bore the following couplet : Great is thy power and great thy fame; Far kenn'd and noted is thy name, The motto had been slily furnished by a tory, and it had been hanging up all day before it was found that it was the opening couplet of Burns's “‘ Address to the Devil.” —Zx. “* Miss SPRIGGINS wears such hideous clothes, I wonder where she gets them,” said a matron at Long Branch. **Why, don’t you know ?” exclaimed Miss Pourke, of Cincin- nati. ‘Her clothes are made at home. She’s some of that Chicago dressed meat you read of.”— Pittsburg Chronicle. Mr. Presnap : Waiter, here is a button in the soup. Walter: Ah, yes—the cook’s. Well you can have it. He'll never miss it.— Rambler. THE ANGELS WERE WELL RID OF HIM. THE new baby had proved itself the possessor of extraordinary vocal powers and had exercised them much to Johnny’s annoy- ance. One day he said to his mother: ‘*Ma, little brother came from Heaven, did n't he?” “Yes, dear.” Johnny was silent for some time, and then he went on : “Say, ma.” “What is it, Johnny ?”” ‘I don’t blame the angels for bouncing him, do you?”— Merchant Traveler, A COLORED woman was heard this morning informing a neighbor that last night’s storm frightened her so that she “shook like an ash-pan."—Pittsburg Chronicle- Telegraph. FRAKAVER, LADIES TAILOR, HABIT MAKER and HATTER oF Ig EAST 21ST STREET, NEW YORK, LONDON, ANI iD BELLEVUE AVENUE, Newport, “No, I must have LUNDBORG'S. I have never been disappointed in any of those perfumes.” LUNDBORQ’S PERFUMES, Edenia, Alpine Violet, Marechal Niel Rose, Lily of the Valley, LUNDBORC’S RHENISH COLOGNE. H.B. KIRK & CO. 1158 Broadway, cor. 27th St. 69 Fulton Street, 9 Warren Street. Recognized as one of the Leading and Most Reliable WINE HOUSES IN AMERICA. ESTABLISHED 1853. A large variety of Grocer’s Condiments, The Otpest and Cuorcest WINES AND LIQUORS, Some of which we have owned ourselves THIRTY YEARS, AT MODERATE PRICES. Honest Madeira, $3.50 per gallon: good value. Sour Mash Whiskies, five Summers old, $4 per gallon, No other house can furnish Old Crow RYE. CELEBRATED HATS LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts. and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., lew York, Palmer House, Chicago. 914 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia. Columbia Bicycles and Tricycles. Spring Catalogue Sent Free. THE. POPE MFG. CO, 07 Washington St., Boston. Branch Houses: x2 Warren St, N. Y. 115 Wabash Ave., Chicago, is pleased to announce that he has reopened his New- port branch for the season, where, by his personal su- pervision, it will be his highest aim to secure a continuance of lib ; eral _ patronage, earned by produc ing the most per- fect fit and ele- ganes in design in is Specialty. Inspection is in- vited to a line. of choicest Fabrics, suitable for the seaside, mountain, Traveling and for Riding Habits. PRIESTLEY’S NEW SILK WARP FABRICS Among the new materials especially commended is the Clairette, also shown with a border for veils, This soft, dainty fabric seems impervious to hardship, and while light in weight, is sufficiently black to be assumed even in deep mourning. Convent cloth will be much worn in the early spring. Gypsy Cloth is an etamine fine and artistic in draping, while firm in texture. This Pansy is a soft twill, fine and beautiful, and will undoubtedly prove a favorite.—Delineator. Wheat Baking Powder. SUPERIOR TO ALL IN WHOLESOMENESS. MARTIN KALBFLEISCH’S SONS, NEW YORK, BROOKLYN, BUFFALO CHICAGO. comicbooks.com