Life — July 22, 1886 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Osa Te angler sits upon the sward and waits to feel the tug ; And there, at intervals, is heard ‘The gurgle of the jug. -—Boston Courier. “Tue born poet,” truly remarks Miss Cleveland, ‘has’ no agony in his song.” Indeed no. It is the poor wretch who lis- tens to his song who lies awake and moans for the chloroform.— Burdette. POETRY APPLIED TO COOKERY. YounG Hovsewi!re ; I wish to get a pair of chickens, Dealer : Yes’m. Here are some very nice ones. Y. H.: Have you any game chickens? D.: Well, ma’m, they do n't often kill game chickens. keep ‘em for show. Y. H.: I should prefer game chickens. D, : For what reason, ma’m ? H. Because game chickens are brave. D.: Well, what o’ that? Y. H.: The poet says, ‘the bravest are the tenderest.”— Boston Courier, They AN exchange thinks that the Chinese way of removing dandruff with sandpaper is the most effectual. Perhaps it is; but the common North American Indian has a plan which, though quite abrupt, is said to be reasonably sure.—£stelline (Dak.) Bell. 55 THE SAVAGE TONGUE NOT SOOTHED. A youn lady singing a sentimental romanza displayed not only extraordinary talent but a set of enormous teeth. “* Ah,” said a lady auditor to her husband, ‘‘ what a grand organ !” “Perfect,” rejoined her husband, “even to the keyboard in her mouth.”—Zroy Times. A HINT TO MARRIAGEABLE GIRLS. HE: Miss Elsa, do you play on the piano? She: No, sir ; I can’t play a single note. He : Elsa, I love you. AN Englishman, calling at the White House, was descanting to Mr. Lincoln—who had never been abroad—about the differ- ences between Englishmen and Americans. ‘* Great difference in some respects,” he said ; “great difference. You Américans do things that an English gentleman would never think of doing. Now, for instance, an English gentleman would never think of blacking his own boots.” ‘‘Ah, indeed!" said Mr. Lincoln, “whose would he black ?”—Argonaut, ‘ AN ECHO FROM THE MINSTRELS, “Mr. Jones,” said the end man with the insinuating voice for which he ceased to be famous some time during the reign of Elizabeth, ‘‘can you tell me how to invest money so that it will go the farthest?” “No, Mr. Thompson, I am not aware that I can. How do you invest money so tiie it will go the farthest 2” ‘*Why, you buy postage stamps, to be sure.” The orchestra played and Bones sang ‘ Why is our Grover’s ART! PHOSACID. Good for Nervousness. Water, or Mixed with’ Liquors. by Druggists Generally. KALBFLEISCH’S SONS, N. Y. vest cut low ?”— 7id-Bits, LADIES’ TAILOR, Excellent in Soda For Sale INLAD & (0. HABIT MAKER and HATTER, a ie : Ig EAST 2IST STREET, NEW YORK, LONDON, ‘AND. BELLEVUE AVENUE, Newport, is pleased to announce that he has reopened his New- port branch for the season, “No, I must have LUNDBORG'S. I have never been disappointed in any of those perfumes. LUNDBORC’S PERFUMES, Edenia, Alpine Violet, Marechal Niel Rose, Lily of the Valley, LUNDBORGC’S RHENISH COLOCNE. Ne copvrienvED. CELEBRATED HATS AND LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts. and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., New York. Palmer House, Chicago. 914 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia. where, by his personal su- vervision, it will be his highest aim to secure a continuance of lib eral _ patronage, carned by produc- ing the most per- fect fit and ele- ance in design in is Specialty. Inspection is in- vited to a line of choicest Fabrics, suitable for the i . seaside, mountain, Traveling and for Riding Habits. Columbia Bicycles and Tricycles. Spring Catalogue Sent Free. THE POPE MFG. CO, 507 Washington St., Boston. Branch Houses : 12 Warren St., N.Y. 115 Wabash Ave., Chicago. AMUSEMENTS. EDEN MUSEE, 23d St.,bet sth @ 6th Aves. Open from rrto1r. Sundays, x to 11. ALWAYS DELIGHTFULLY COOL. CONSTANTLY SOMETHING NEW. PROMENADE CONCERTS DAILY. ADMISSION, so CENTS. CHILDREN, 25 CENTS. THE MYSTIFYING CHESS AUTOMATON, AJEEB. PRIESTLEY’S NEW SILK WARP FABRICS Among the new materials especially commended is the Clairette, also shown with a border for veils. This soft, dainty fabric seems impervious to hardship, and while light in weight, is; sufficiently black to be assumed even in deep mourning. y Cloth is an etamine fine and artistic in draping, while firm in texture. early spring. Gy] Convent cloth will be much worn in ‘This Pansy is a soft twill, fine and beautiful, and will undoubtedly prove s favorite. Delincarar. Wheat Baking Powder. SUPERIOR TO ALL IN WHOLESOMENESS. MARTIN KALBFLEISCH’S SONS, NEW YORK, BROOKLYN, BUFFALO, CHICAGO, comicbooks.com