Life — June 10, 1886 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE FAT SMERS AT WLLs WHY THE CASE WAS DISMISSED. YOUNG man had been arrested for kissing a pretty girl, and she was on the witness stand, “You say,” said the attorney for the defendant, ‘‘ that the young man kissed you against your will 7 “Yes, he did, and he did it a dozen times, too,”” ** Well, now, is it not true that you also kissed him during the affray ?” Objected to ; objection overruled. “Now answer my question,” continued the attorney. you not kiss the defendant also ?” “ Yes, I did,” replied the witness indignantly, “‘ but it was in self-defense.” — Washington Critic. “Did “‘Tuere,” said Mrs. Highflyer, as her daughter ceased from torturing one of the high-numbered “ ops” of Beethoven, “ that's what I call a finished performance, eh, Mr. Jones ?” And Mr. Jones nodded and said, “* thank Heaven !"—£x, THe other morning at the Tombs, says the New York Sun, before one of our most courteous police justices, a war of words waxed hot and furious between two distinguished lawyers of that locality. “Sir,” said one, in a vigorous aside, “ you are a con- foun ed liar, “ Sir.” responded the other, “ you are an infernal fool.” “Gentlemen, gentlemen,” entreated the courteous judge, “you will kindly address your observations to the court.” 335 A ConcressMAn’s daughter had been receiving a young man’s attentions until the father thought it was time he was knowing something about it. ‘‘ Celestine,” he said last night, when the young man was announced, ‘‘is n't it about time some definite Conclusion was being arrived at in this matter?” “ Quite time, papa,” she replied in a matter-of-fact way.‘ Well, daughter, is there any prospect of a conclusion?” ‘I can’t really say 1 Papa You see he is on the calendar as unfinished business, an: ‘* Enough, daughter, enough,” he interrupted, putting up up his hands, and the girl went down stairs to complete the quorum.— Washington Critic. AT a large and would-be fashionable wedding recently held in a town in this State the solemnity was rudely disturbed by a rather unexpected answer. The bride had entered on her uncle's arm, and was met by the groom at the chancel, The uncle then retired and took a seat in the body of the house. All went well until the clergyman asked the question : “ Who giveth this woman to be wedded to this man?” He paused for an answer, and the uncle rose and, placing his hands on the pew in front of him, said, in accents louder than are common at weddings, ‘‘ Me !""—Boston Traveller. HE was riding with his elder sister, and thought he could take some liberties. ‘*Have you any objections to my smoking, Mabel Len he asked, No,” she replied “if you desire to smoke, the coachman will help you to aligh '—Lowell Citizen, Wuen we consider the belligerent attitude of Greece against the defenceless European powers, we can't help thinking what an awful thing it would be if Rhode Island should rise up in rebellion some day and wipe out the United States.—Somerville Henry Holt & Co., 29 W. Twenty-third Street, N. Y., Want PHOSACID. Good for Nervousness, waters or Mixed with Li ists Generally. KALBFLEISCH'S SONS, N. Y. IKAAKAVER LADIES’ TAILOR, Excellent in Soda quore. For Sal HAVE JUST PUBLISHED Children of the Earth. A NEW AMERICAN NOVEL By ANNE ROBERTSON MACFARLANE, HAMLET.— How do ye both?” ROSENCRANZ—" As the Indiferent children of the earth.” x6mo, Leisure Hour Series, $1.00. C7 A Novel, by 8 new though thoroughly trained writer. ‘The author is already favorably known through short stories in “ Harper's Weekly” and elsewhere, and as a regular writer of Uterary criticisms for “THR NATION.” The story is onelof everyday people swayed by ordinary motives with which all “Indifferent children of the earth” can sympathize, but it is presented with a clearness and power sure to evoke the sympathy. What “questions’’ are touched upon are presented in the characters and action, rather by synthesis than by the ** subtle analysis” of which much of the reading world is becoming tired, The scenes, CELEBRATED HATS LADIES’ ROUND HATS. 178 & 180 Fifth Ave., bet. 22d & 23d Sts. and 181 Broadway, near Cortlandt St., a New York. vey Palmer House, Cacao: 914 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia, HABIT MAKER and HATTER, 19 EAST 21ST STREET, MEW YORK, Newport and London, Is now exhibiting the largest selection of Stuffs Fabrics, comprising the latest patterns, from leading manufacturers in Europe—Prarsonatty se- LECTED FOR MY SPECIAL- 1. Ladies who favor me with their patronage can be assured that my estab- lishment will, as hereto- fore, sustain its reputation for taste, style and unsur- passed " workmanship. The Larest. in Ridiog, Traveling and Yachting ‘A. perfect fit guaran- teed, and every garment STRICTLY TAILOR MADR. are on the wild Nova Scotia coast and in New York society. No Saint. A STUDY. By ADELINE SERGEANT, author of “ Beyond Recall.” Leisure Hour Serles, $1; Leisure Moment, 3p cents. suf A pew novel by this promising new author. Its“ motive” is indicated by the lines from Matthew Arnold : “An! from the old world let some answer give PRIESTLEY’S NEW SILK WARP FABRICS ng the materials especially commended is the Clairette, for. as ernie soft, dainty fabric ate impervious to hardship, and while light in weight, is also shown with a border ficiently black to be assumed even in deep pedine . Convent cloth ae be much worn in the early spring. Oy ray ett aes ctemtoe ae artistic in di This Pansy is a soft twill, fine and Seautiful,and ‘will undoubtedly prove a favorite.— Delimrator, g,, while firm in texture. orn ye this world, their tears, their inward cares, Tan tyra al rw solve MRS, HOMER MARTIN'S NOVEL: “Whom God Hath Joined.” Wheat. Baking SUPERIOR TO ALL IN) WHO ALL IN Powder. (OLESOMENESS. 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