Life, 1885-09-24 · page 13 of 16
Life — September 24, 1885 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Commentary on "Scissors at Nulls" (Life Magazine, Page 181) This page contains five brief satirical anecdotes typical of *Life* magazine's humor format. The jokes rely on unexpected twists and social observations: 1. **New Minister/Deacon Smith**: A clergyman tries tactfully asking a parishioner's occupation but gets an embarrassing answer from his four-year-old daughter—she overheard his wife threaten to "snatch him bald-headed" if he continued some misdeed. The satire targets both the minister's clumsy indirection and implied marital discord. 2. **Railway Station**: A deaf gentleman misunderstands repeated apologies for an accidental kick, asking "Where?" The humor comes from literalism and miscommunication. 3. **Streetcar Dude**: A small, fashionably-dressed man offers his cramped seat to a large woman with a dog; she quips it will "just fit the dog." The satire mocks pretentious politeness meeting blunt reality. 4. **Southern Servant**: A maid's sarcastic comeback to her employer criticizing her for sitting in the chair. 5. **Police/Boy**: A bystander's cheeky remark to a policeman. The page is primarily advertisements for books, soap, tailors, and perfume.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Ks SEISORS AT NVLLv) NEW minister over on the West Side was around during the week making the acquaintance of his parishioners. He called on Deacon Smith, and desiring to ascertain what business the deacon was in without seeming too curious, he concluded to get at it in another way. “Now, my little girl,” he said to the four-year-old, “what is your name 7” ‘* Sadie Smif, sir.” “Your papa goes down-town every morning, I spose. Can you tell me what he does down-town ‘No, I tan’t ; but I heard ma tell him the other night if he did it any more she'd snatch him bald-headed. Didn't you, ma?'—Chicago Herald, A POLITE stranger in a railway station. said to an old gentle- man whom he had accidentally kicked with his foot : “I beg your pardon, sir.” “Eh?” said the deaf old gentleman. “*T beg your pardon, sir,” repeated the polite stranger, now slightly embarrassed. "1 don't quite understand you,” he said, mildly, “*T beg your pardon, I kicked you.” “What for?” “An accident !” roared the stranger. “An accident? Bless me! Where?"—£x, 181 IT JUST FIT THE DOG, In a Sixth avenue street car filled with ladies a ninety-pound dude sat wedged in one corner. At Twenty-third street a fat woman, handsomely dressed, and with a little dog in her arms, goton. The little dude struggled to his feet and touched his hat litely, remarking facetiously, “ Madame, will you take this seat?” The fat lady looked at the crevice he had left and thanked him pleasantly. ‘You are very kind, sir,” she said; “T think it will just fit the dog.” And it did.—St. Paul Globe, Tue colored servant in the South is occasionally good at repartee. Mrs, Verger found her servant, Belinda, reposing in the rocking-chair reading a newspaper, “ You seem to think you are-the lady of the house,” said Mrs. Yerger, sarcastical “No, mum, I Texas Siftings. Brack, but I is not such a fool as that.”— “ Any quails about this neighborhood ?" inquired a tourist as he was about to register at a Lake George hotel. **Quails !" said the proprictor with an indulgent smile, “the; have got to be a nuisance. The cook complains that he can't throw a piece of refuse toast out of the back window but that four or five fat quails Gght to see which one shall lie down on it. Here, Front, dow this gentleman to parlor A."—New York Sun, ‘KNOWLEDGE IS POWER.” PoticeMAN: *‘ Now, then—move on! there’s nothing the matter.” Boy in crowd: “Yer needn't tell us that; you wouldn't be HENRY HOLT & Co. HAVE JUST PUBLISHED Tue Rep Route; A NOVEL. By WILLIAM SIME. 16mo, Leisure Hour Series, $1.00; See Leisure Moment Series, 35cts- Cashmere Bouquet Toilet Soap. Has the largest sale of any superfine toilet erfume novel and excep- tionally strong. Send four cents in stamps to Colgate & Co., N. Y., for sample cake. here if there was !"—£x, LADIES’ TAILOR, on 19 EAST arst ST., HS MEW YORK. LEY Loxpon Anp Newport. Carry’ Is now showing his fresh novel ties for the Abtuma Sexson te \eched from leading Loodon and Parts Houses, Ladies will find his stock the ‘their latest” Improve: Joffeed 6. Carroll, TAILOR & IMPORTER, “Autumn aod Winter’? London Novelties in great variety, Also rece and Summer Henriette Frame, ROBES AND MANTEAUX, takes oceasion to announce that she'is ia of ery cuties novelties for Spring “ok Out of town orders receive special atten- tion. | Perfect &t guaranteed on receipt of measurement, 232 West 228 Street, Dew York. ments. ALL GARMENTS ARE SyRicTLY Tatton MADEand DasiGNeD. VY THE MINIATURE STATUETTE OF the Bartholdi Statue. Oaly $1.00 each, Address, RICHARD BUTLER, Sec’y. 33 Mercer Street, New York. Specialties in Low Priced Suitings and Overcoatings, Exclusive and Correct Styles, 166 Srocth Sove., NEW YORK. ——COMMON SENSE BINDER—— FOR BINDING “LIFE: Cheap, Strong and Durable, Will hold 2 numbers. Mailed to any part ef the United States fer $1. Address, office of “LIFE,” 1155 Broanway, N.Y. PRIESTLEY’S SILK WARP HENRIETTAS Are easily distinguished by their softness and beauty and regularity of finish. They are made of the finest silk and best Australian Wool, and are the most thoroughly reliable goods in the market. Lundborg’s Perfume, Edenia. Lundborg’s Perfume, Maréchal Niel Rose. Lundborg’s Perfume, Alpine Violet. Lundborg’s Perfume, Lily of the Valley. Lundborg’s Rhenish Cologne. comicbooks.com