Life — August 27, 1885 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

SOMETHING ONE WOULD WISH TO HAVE EXPRESSED DIFFERENTLY, CAMP MEETING EPISODE. IS THERE NO HAPPY MEDIUM. HE man who is spending the sum- mer in New York complains of a heavy feeling in the head, feet and body, and of a corresponding weakness in the legs. The man at the mountains says his head and feet are all right, and as light as you please, but there is an empty feeling in the region of the stomach. NE of the most remarkable pieces of evidence of Design in nature on record comes to us from Keene Val- ley, N. Y. During the severe thunder- storm of last week the house of a resident was struck by lightning and the only damage (?) done was the total demolition of a pet banjo. G ERAL WOLSELEY has been thanked for the expeditious way in which he did n't rescue Gordon. It's a great thing to be an English general. hundred salt water converts taken that day, a fact which | caused the Presbyterians and Methodists to assume a re- markably verdant hue to their eyes, and there is considerable talk of a coalition betwixt these two churches, with the avowed intention of running their more prosperous rival | out. The Town Council, consisting of seven Elders and two Deacons of Methodistic and Presbyterian failings, with only one representative from the Baptist life-saving corps, has struck the first blow by prohibiting bathing on Sundays and limiting the costume of the surf to a pair of trousers, canvas shoes, and red tennis shirts. Such a rule as this naturally tends to destroy the picturesque beauty of a Baptist service, and brings it down to the level of an ungodly romp, more characteristic of Long Branch than of so staid a town as Asbury Park. The Baptists complain bitterly at this, and fear that they will share the same fate as the Dutch Reformers, who were compelled to leave town by the Beer Statute of 1881, which forbade the importation of malt liquors, an act which it will | be readily understood the Reformed Dutch were as unable to comply with as their unreformed brothers. Such a spirit of intolerance is unworthy of the Methodists and Presbyterians, but as a prominent pastor of the latter flock remarked, “It's business.” The bathing over, the SAUNTERER unwittingly attended a dinner at the mansion of Elder Jenkins of the Wesleyan Order, but owing to certain fasting customs here observed was compelled to seek other refreshment later. A firework was exploded in his honor in the evening, and after a hilarious symposium on plain soda, the fire bells sounded nine o'clock, and the worthy citizens of the Park retired after a delightfully jolly day. The only unpleasant feature of the proceedings was the arrest of the young theological student, who imitated Mr. | Beecher, for saying Gosh and smoking a corn silk cigarette. Such depravity, however, the SAUNTERER is happy to say is exceedingly rare in this neighborhood. (NoTe.—I am tired after this day’s dissipation, and am off for Mt. Desert for a little quiet rest.] Cholmondeley Harcourt. “oe? IS, love, fifteen,” she shyly called, And lightly swung the tennis bat— I had forgot the count, enthralled By witching face beneath her hat, By girlish face and graceful mien, “’T was, love, fifteen.” And so we played. The game was done, And she the victor was elate. In other courts I strove, and won, So Love my loss did compensate. There's now no parting net between, 'T is Love, Fifteen. Very RASH—A boy with measles. comicbooks.com