Life — May 21, 1885 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

oh FEASORS AT Wb OCTOR ; ‘Your wife is in a very critical state, —, 1 should recommend you to call in some specialist to con- sult on. ihe case.” Husba “ There, you see, doctor, I hiad right aj ! I told my wife long ago she ought to get pro medical advice, but she thought you might be Sflended | Fhe. gende Blatter, IN THE LecisLaTuRe.— ‘ Mr. Speaker, I arise to place in ation a man, sir, what we all know, sir, to be a man what ain't got no rnowhar, We all know that he is more than qualified, sir, for the position, for I sarved with him durin’ the wah, sir; he will not only represent the great Democratic partee, but, sir, the entire State. Durin’ the dark an’ bloody days when the pale face of hunger put its bloody hand von the heart of the nation, he was found to be as true as steel, an’ grabbed the gory wolf by the lappels of his shirt and shook him until he loudly begged for mercy."—Arkansaw Traveller, At Andrian, Mich., a lady saw an engine-bouse with a steeple, and innocently asked a gentleman attendant, ‘* What church is that?” The gentleman after reading the sign, “ Deluge No. 3,” replied, “I guess it must be the Third Baptist.—Chicago Times. ‘Tommy, did you hear your mother call you?” ‘Course I did.” “* Then why don’t you go to her at once?” “ Well, you see, she 's nervous, and it "d sherk her awful if I should go too sudden."—Chicago Tribune. 293 A WAR EDITORIAL, The editor sat sadly at his desk. His mouth was puckered with the expression a man assumes when he tries to cut a tough piece of meat with a silver pie-knife. His cheeks were dis- tended on one side by a chew of tobacco, on the other by a mouthful of Asiatic words, To the thoughtful student of international politics the recent action of Gladstone cannot but appear weak in the extreme. If he had ordered the troops to attack Rawil-Pisode, instead of waiting for General Kushk on the banks of the Komaroff, a gest advantage to England would certainly have followed, and ikhs, as far as Kohn-Dilain was concerned, would—— “ William !" “Yessir.” “Bring mea fresh dictionary and an ice-water bandage for my head,"—Free Press. On the evening of May rst, Mark Twain was the bright, par- ticular attraction at the Founder's Day Celebration at Vassar. With a gallantry, alike equal to his humor and to the occasion, he remarked to the charming young ladies who swarmed around him that his usnal price of a lecture was $500, but this time he was satisfied with fifty cents, while he took the remaining $499.50 in looking at the girls.—Brooklyn Union. A MAN in a smoking car on a Danbury and Norwalk railway train, this morning, leaned over to the man who sat in front of him and said : “* Have you a match?” “Yes; but I hain't got any cigar,” was the prompt reply. “Then you can't want the match,” said the first man sweetly. —Danbury News, Henry Holt & Co.'s New Books. MORE NEW ARABIAN NIGHTS, by ROB- ERT LOUIS STEV, ‘ENSON, containing” The Dynamiter,” etc., the Leiture Hour Series, $1, and the Leisure Moment Series, AINEEY, HOLLOW, a tale of Early Connec- sient, by G. H. HOLLIST: R, Leisure Mom THE COMPL LETION OF TAINE'S FRENCH VOLUTION. Vet. III, mow ready. 32mo. 0 cents. Toilet cot, 2 dEbice a WARING 'S ‘HOW ze DEA 4m 'OUSE i ractical.and and increasin, DESON'S "AT THE SIGN O) 4 new volume of poems in the same vein wi Ais Favorite ‘Vignettes in Rhyme. same, $2. FARRAR. S at1 ITARY MANNERS AND tame. $1.9 LA CHANSON DE ROLAND, translated by Leonce Rabilion, rome. Stas. Cashmere Bouquet Has ithe largest sale of any superfine toilet p- Perfame novel tionally strong. Send four cents in stamps to Colgate & Co., N. Y., for sample cake. yaa ues Krakauer, Ladies’ Tailor & Habit Maker, Beets sand tellevue Ave., Newport. Has received the latest novelties from London and Paris for traveling, walking and yachting costuines, ste ve fine line of ing Styles in goods «1 atte Habits, Ulsters and Jackets. Mr. Krakauer gives his personal attention to each of his patrons. ders from out of town attended to without delay, A perfect fit guaranteed with- out personal attendance. HoaGiathe Frame, Soap. and excep- ROBES AND MANTEAUX, takes occasion to announce that she'is_ in receipt of very choice novelties for Spring . ER PISTORY OF TRE U D. WHITNEY'S BRIEFER GERMAN PORAMMAR. ie G. Careoll, TAILOR & IMPORTER. In view of the increasing demand for garments of elegance and HIGH CLASS STANDARD of style, at reasonable prices, we are prepared to meet the eme: cy with an unusually select line "We a wear, acceptable to the most ined taste. pridiog, Costumes and Liveries in Styles. 166 Siocth Jbve., NEW YORK, French.-German.-Spanish. YOU cas, by ten weeks? study, master either of these lan- guages suficieatly for every-day and tusiness conver. Seo lege of answers to ail questions, and cor: coe, ee ee an Copy, paris cts. Liberal Terms to Teachers. Meisterschaft Publishing Co., Boston, Mass, Box 227s. BYY THE MINIATURE STATUETTE OF the Bartholdi Statue. Only $:.: Address, RICHARD BUTLER, Sec'y, 33 Mercer Street, New York. and Summer Costumes. Out of town orders receive special atten= tion, | Perfect fit guaranteed oo receipt of 232 “OWest "529 Street, Mew Work. GEO. MATHER’S SONS RINTING INK 60 JOHN STREET, N. Y. THIS PAPER IS PRINTED WITH OUR SPECIAL -LIFE- INK. Lundborg’s Perfume, Edenia. 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