Life, 1885-04-30 · page 5 of 16
Life — April 30, 1885 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Analysis of Life Magazine Page 243 This page contains heraldic illustrations of two American aristocratic families—**Laurelard** and **Belkins**—presented as part of "The American Peerage," compiled by Perk for Manhattan society. The satire mocks the American obsession with inherited nobility and genealogical distinction. Each coat of arms includes humorous biographical details undermining the families' pretensions: Laurelard's entry references a "Tobacco-Dealer" ancestor and notes they "thrive best when they can procure a quid"; Belkins' includes astronomical and financial accomplishments suggesting self-made wealth rather than aristocratic tradition. The bottom section, "Great Jones Street," is an unrelated poem questioning what made a certain Jones worthy of having a street named after him—extending the satirical theme that American "greatness" lacks the traditional markers of European nobility.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
THE AMERICAN PEERAGE. COMPILED BY Laurelard. s Cg avant awn) \} ae LAURELARD-DE-LA-REMISE, Pierro Equus; Sheepshead and Master of the Horse. Lineage. ancient stock of the Equidz. The Stud-Book shows that the house of Laurelard is thoroughbred. Pverro, sired by Tobacco-Dealer, sited by Jmmigrant, etc., back to Eclipse. A peculiar distinction of the present Earl is his method of | feeding and rearing race-horses; he has found that they thrive best when they can procure a quid (fro guo). | Arms: On a field turf; a race-horse, proper, passant, between three tobacco-plants slipped, proper. A canton argent, charged with | a caltrop (implement for obstructing hostile cavalry). Crest : A book-maker's bulletin. | Supporters: Two wooden Indians, each bearing a bunch of cigars. Motto: “Quantum Souff?” [Some of the younger members of the house substitute, ‘‘ Which Horse that Best may Run."] | Seat; Monmouth Hall (famed for its dining-room, fitted up with rosewood stalls and bronze mangers). Clubs : Jockey and Knickerbocker, Earl of From the | PERK, ULTERIOR KNIGHT FOR MANHATTAN, Welkings. BELKINS, Stephen, Baronet ; Commander of the Charitable Order of Elkins. Sir Stephen owes his title to his achieve- ments as an astronomer. He aided in establishing the great system of sidereal post-routes, and discovered the Milky Way of squeezing the Treasury; also organized the scientific expedition up Salt River to take observations on the eclipse of November 5, 1884; was a leading member of the De- partment of the Left, and on the Fourth of March, 1885, was appointed Secretary of the Exterior, as a reward for faithful services in the disastrous campaign of '84. Arms: Argent, a chevron, sable, charged with three mullets of the first, between three postage stamp gules surrounded by as many mullets of the second. Crest: A roll of coin, erect. Supporters: Two cowboys. Motto: ‘In Cheek I Trust.” Seat: Capitalist’, Delmonico Table. Club; Stuffed. GREAT JONES STREET. “J passed, to-doy, a street with an interesting name—Great Jones Street.” —Extract from New York Letter. WONDER where did Great Jones live ? And what did Great Jones do ? Was he an ordinary Jones, And yet a great one, too? Was Mrs. Jones her husband's peer? Or was his greatness rare For her of different ancestry, To envy, not to share? Were all the little Joneses Great In appetite or limb ? Or did the greatness of the house Centre alone in him ? What sort of greatness was it that Immortalized this Jones ? Of mind, of wealth, or wickedness, Benevolence or bones? We may not know. And yet whate’er It was, what pile so meet For,monument to Jones's fame As simply, “ Great Jones Street ?” comicbooks.com