Life — January 22, 1885 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘LIFE: Tt rising youth gazed inquiringly at the plain, unpreten- tious facade of the historic structure, and the father, who evidently hoped for a prompt decision on the side of mental so- lidity, became impatient. “My son,” he said, ‘you will remember here’s where they keep the ‘liberty bell;’ the portraits of all the heroes and states- men of the Revolution; arms carried by the great generals in bat- tle, and hundreds of interesting relics of the turbulent period pre- ceeding the foundation of our republic.” “These things must be very interesting, father. cost to go in?” “It is all free, my son,” said the parent delightedly. “Bosh !” replied the centralization of hope. “Let's go where it costs something to get in.” And sadly the father led the way toa resort of the freaks,—Zx, What does it Tuey were gliding over the glare surface of the ice togethe: making graceful sweeps with the glittering blades of their “clul “I'll dare you to make the fancy figures qn the ice that I. will, said Reginald, “I'm quite sure, Regy, my boy, that you could beat me handsomely at that,” replied Algernon. ‘‘The fancy fig- ures I make on the ice generally depend on the particular plaid pattern there ison my trousers.” And he immediately illustrated. —Hartford Post. “I saw your advertisement for a ‘young man of good addreis,"” remarked one of the applicants for a vacant position, “and I 55 thought I would call in and reply. My address is Boston, Mass., and if that is n't as good as the best, I should like to know where you will find a better one.— Burlington FresPress. “Dip you pass the hat 2” the pastor of a Texas con, regation asked his deacon after the morning service. “Yes, I ‘fa. * said the deacon, and then; looking into the vacant interior of a hat that anted nothing but lining, he added gloomily, ‘So did every- body else."—Brooklyn Eagle, THE peasants of Huntingdonshire are proverbial for their boor- ishness, One day a lady, riding through the grounds of a friend to whom she was on a visit, found the gate closed which was the outlet from the fields to the high road ; a peasant boy stepped forward, and bowing, opened the gate that she might pass. “What is your name?’ asked the lady. ‘*Tummus,” said the boy, with another bow, ‘‘Ah!" replied the lady, giving him a shilling, “I see you are not a Huntingdonshire boy—you are so civil.” To which the urchin rejoined—"‘Thee 'rt a liar; I be."—Glasgow Evening Times, “Wut is the breed of your calf?” said a would-be buyer to a farmer. “ Well,” said the farmer, ‘‘ all I know about it is that his father gored a justice of the peace to death, tossed a book-agent into the fence corner, and stood a lightning-rod man on his head ; and his mother chased a female lecturer two miles, and if that ain’t breed enough to ask $4 on you needn't take him."—New Orleans Picayune, “ GeorcE,” said the young wife, “I know what Santa Claus is going to bring me Christmas." ‘Do you, love? What is it?” “An elegant sealskin sacque, George.” ‘You don't say so. Well, Iam glad to hear it, for it will save me a good deal of money.” And then she went out into the kitchen and stepped on the cat and gave the cook a week’s notice.—Boston Post, THE PUBLISHERS OF LIF LADY BRASSEY’S| NEW BOOK. In the Trades, the Tropics, and the | Roaring Forties. Elegantly illustrated with nearly 300 wood en- gravings and ten maps and charts. One of the | most sumptuous books of travel ever issued, | HENRY HOLT &CO.,N.Y.! Cashmere. Bouquet Toilet Soap. OFFER UNUSUAL ADVANTAGES TO THOSE WHO PROPOSE ISSUING ILLUST RATED ~ Books, PAMPHLETS, CATALOGUES, CIRCULARS, ETC., AND WHO DESIRE WORK OF AN ARTISTIC ORDER. ESTIMATES GIVEN, AND BOTH TEXT AND ILLUSTRATIOD FURNISHED IF DESIRED, JACQUES KRAKAUER, Lyoies Tatton ann Hanit Maker, 29 E. ast St., N. ¥.,and Bellevue Ave., Newport. Would respectfully an- nounce to the Ladies that he will make SPECIALLY LOW PRICES, from date to February rth, in order to keep his large force of specialists fully em- ployed. N. B.—This announce- ment is strictly limited to the period named. Special attention paid to toall orders sent by mail. A perfect fit guaranteed without personal attend= ance. THE GENUINE | FRANK B.CONVERSE THE FRANK B. CONVERSE Banjo Instruction and Salesroom, 6: West 42d Street, New York. OUR SPECIALTIES. Ricuty Bourn axp Itiustratep Girt Books STANDARD AND MisceLLangous LireraTure. Send four cents in stamps to Colgate & Co., N. Y., for sample cake. | That coachman again! ** My daughter, | what is this conversation you are having | with James?" a cake of SAPOLIO,” Stationexy vor Faswionast® Society. Wepoinc, Recartion anv Visttinc Carps. “Oh, Lonly asked him to buy me a-a- Pictortat ENGRAVING ON Steet PLates. GEO. R. LOCKWOOD & SON, Publithers, Booksellers, Stationers & Engravers 812 Broadway, New York. comicbooks.com