Life — November 6, 1884 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

; Anything to beat Cleveland. VOL. IV. NOV. 6TH, 1884. NO. oF: 1155 Broapway, New York, Published every Thursday, $5 a year in advance, postage free. Single copies, 10 cents. Back numbers can be had by applying | to this office. Vol. I., 50 cents per copy ; Vols. IT. and IIT, at regular rates, Rejected contributions will not be returned unless accompanied by a stamped and directed envelope. have elected Grover Cleveland President of the United States. Every American citizen may be proud of the fact. It means that an honest desire to have honest government, and to see the honor and integrity of the nation preserved, has supplanted in the hearts of many mere party rancor and factional stubbornness. It means that the machine has grown rusty from the polluting corrup- | tion in which it has been steeped, and that the party which was insolent enough to rear such a candidate as James G. Blaine for its head, has been justly rebuked. It means death to rings and bureaus ; death to monopoly ; death to political office as a stepping-stone to the penitentiary, and life to honesty, industry and merit. Grover Cleveland has been a good mayor and an energetic and incorruptible governor, and he will make a President of whose record the nation will be proud. Not since the days of Lincoln has a candidate received the highest honors of the Republic with more mod- esty or worth. Mr. Cleveland's public and private life is above | reproach, His worst enemy cannot accuse him of malfeas- ance. In each successive stage of his career he has shown an unswerving fidelity and an ambition to serve the people whose interests he was chosen to guard. He is a vigilant and upright officer, to whose zeal, discretion and ability we can safely trust the fortunes of this great government. The party whose | chief he has succeeded achieved great things in its day, but it outlived its usefulness, It fell into rioting and plunder and ! general decay. It was unwholesome and rank and smelled to | heaven. It was swollen and unsightly, and, forsaken by its best friends and supported only by the vermin that lived upon its carrion, it died the death it richly deserved and is now laid away forever. Grover Cleveland is President of the United Deo gratia! * . * \ States, B =NJAMIN FRANKLIN BUTLER is President of the | United States. In a horn. Benjamin weighs 250 pounds, and is a good man. He is a workingman, Ben is, and he worked very hard in the campaign. So did Dana. | | Well, Benjamin is President, and now every workingman will have a brownstone front and a bank, $4,000,000 in bonds and a silk hat, a beer saloon, a skating rink and much wine, and the envious capitalist will stand afar off and throw mud. Dana elected Ben. That shows what Dana can do when he tries. He elected him just as he elected Holman and Hancock. Benjamin is now where he wanted to be, and we are all happy. Selah. . * * S® JOHN (we forget the rest of his name) is President of the United States. Mr. St. John’s claim to distinction is that he desires to crush out Rum. He says it costs the na- tion $63,000,941,963,046,647,000,988,000.35 a year, not in- cluding lager. This enormous expenditure will now be saved, and put into churches and homes for the Imbecile. We are heartily to be congratulated upon our wisdom in Mr. St. John’s election, He isa worthy successor to our last temperance President, Mrs. Hayes. We need a four years’ course of water cure. We will now get it. . . ° RS. BELVA LOCKWOOD is President of the United States. * . * AMES GILLESPIE BLAINE is President of the United States. J pan! . . * SONG of thanksgiving from Sing-Sing and every slum from Maine to Texas, and a groan from every honest heart. Truly the thief’s lot is happy, and the path of the cor- rupt one lies in pleasant places. Pah! . e * HE above notes were written somewhat ahead of time. One of them will fit the case as it now stands. Ep, LiFe.) . . . HE Rev. Burchard, of “ Murray Hill,” who spoke of the party of “ Rum, Romanism and Rebellion” in his address to Blaine, seems simply to have opened his mouth and gently folded his foot therein. And yet that speech probably cost the reverend gentleman many hours of restless anxiety ! . * R. DANA seems to have abandoned Butler. This is the only thing in the whole campaign that we can see on which the Massachusetts statesman can congratu- late himself. comicbooks.com