Life — August 28, 1884 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

> LIFE: MIDSUMMER MEANDERINGS. Noodleport. OUR Correspondent arrived in Noodleport last Monday on his Yacht Waukenphast, and after declining the Hospitality of the City which was pressed upon him by the Chief of Police in the absence of the Mayor, and which was offered owing to a striking resemblance between myself and a retired Cashier of the Newport Orphan's Bank, I registered at Oshun Hous: I deemed it advisable to disclaim my present Residence at Yorkville and put my home down as Tennysse-Court, Court- Super-Hill, Devon, England. As I supposed I would be I was overwhelmed with atten- tion, childless Earl and possessed an income of £50,000, which little bit of on-d/t/sm carried conviction on the face of it and 1 was made the hero of the hour. Five minutes after my arrival I received an invitation from Mr. Fee-Jee Yisland to attend a reception on his Yacht the Paydphor, which was in Quarantine owing to a supposed case of cholera on board. Following this was an urgent invita- tion to dine with Mrs. Clifton Parvenu who has taken one of the Pirhard Cottages on the Cliff. tainments were for the same hour I availed myself of the Substitute Privilege" and hastily fitting out a fellow: As these two enter- orre= spondent with suitable apparel obtained free for the sake of | the advertisement which the custom of the son of a childless Earl is supposed to bring, I sent him to Mrs. Parvenue's affaire where | understand he created quite a furore by his conversation and easy manners. According to his statement the dinner was the “ boss one of the season, marked by a certain ratson d'etre which elsewhere is supposed to be quite the Avboshe corréte.” There were present Madame Gudeclose neé Duddes and her charming ghters; Gen. Newsance, whose recently acquired fortune | realized from a flyer in lard has made him one of the popular of this tors ; Count Marrons Glacé, whom all the young ladies here consider the “sweetest thing in Lord and Lady Snubbe of Snubbe- Castle, Wal nes Smith, of Morrristown, N. J., the author of the Bread-Winners. Concerning this latter gentle- man, there are several of him here. There were two of him at the Reception on Mr. Fee-Jee Yislands’ Yacht and owing to the crowded condition of the Oshun House I had to share my room with three of him. The Yacht Reception all one could wish. One would think that the ence of cholera on board would have deterred guests, but contraire they came on board crowds. (It may be well to state that more alarm would hav been felt had this been a case of Cholera Americana or the Green Appiline variety, but as it was imported, the Noodle- the au in The report quickly spread that I was the younger son of a | most | pres- | |{porters, being thoroughly inoculated, were not at all dis- ) urbed. ~ Music of a most entrancing kind was furnished by an orchestra from New York, led by the distinguished batonier, Marquis di Grindi, formerly of the New York Pipe Depart- ment, and a well-known member of the Italian Colony. Dancing commenced at 8 P. M., and was carried on until | late at night, the german being led by young Knickerbocker Van Donk and his fiancée, Marigold Munniwell. All Noodle- port was present, together with a few from Narragansett Pier, who were invited as a special mark of condescension. Polo Parties, Tennis Tournaments, Lunches, Lawn Parties, and Casino Hops have taken up the rest of my time. I have been here three days and have had three hours sleep and am convinced that Newport is a charming place for absolute rest. I must leave town to-night, as I see by the paper that | am engaged to Mrs. Parvenu’s eldest daughter, which convinces. me that my “substitute " was no deadhead in our enterprise. CHOLMONDELAY HARCOURT. LAWN TENNIS ON THE BEACH. T HE ocean breeze blows softly, Each yellow sand grain gleams Like a jewel, in the glory Of August's sunlight beams. The sound of girlish laughter, Now varied bya screech, Guides where they ‘re playing tennis— Lawn tennis on the beach. The wavelets sigh and murmur To the sound of “ Fifteen—love !"” And the sea gulls scream and flutter In the sparkling air above; While sand-pipers rise in terror As the balls fly out of reach, They do n't like our game of tennis— Lawn tennis on the beach. Checks rouged by Phazbus’ kisses, Bright eyes and laughing lip: No thought for an onlooker, While the merry morning s Away in useless waiting— Cupid has no chance for speech When the girls are playing tennis— Lawn tennis on the beach, For all talk of love permitted Is in counting up the game ; And, from what I hear, that meaning Is an insult to its name— Tam “ forty "—no “ advantage !" Well, the “deuce!” “ Love's” out of reach, So I'll leave them to their tennis— Lawn tennis on the beach. M. H. G., Kennebunkport. comicbooks.com