Life, 1884-08-14 · page 12 of 16
Life — August 14, 1884 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Explanation for Modern Readers This Life magazine page contains three separate satirical pieces: **"Good Advice"** (top left): A domestic scene where Mother counsels Johnny not to fight, but his brother Tommy points out that counting to forty before striking works—a joke about the ineffectiveness of anger-management advice. **"Dowery Negotiation"** (center/bottom left): A lengthy dialogue in exaggerated Yiddish-inflected English between two Jewish immigrant men haggling over a dowry. The satire mocks both the mercenary nature of dowry negotiations and Jewish immigrant stereotypes of the era. One man eventually admits he'll lie about the amount, suggesting dishonesty in marriage dealings. **"Strategy"** (right): A domestic humor sketch where a burglar breaks into a bedroom but is so offended by being called "nasty" that he destroys the occupant's umbrella as punishment—absurdist humor about wounded pride overriding criminal intent. The page reflects late 19th/early 20th-century American satirical humor, heavy on ethnic stereotyping and domestic/courtship themes considered humorous at the time.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE GOOD ADVICE. Mama; \t 1S VERY WRONG IN YOU, JOHNNY, TO QUARREL IN THIS WAY. Johnny (who has just had a fight with his brother Tom): , | GOT MAD AND HAD TO DO SOMETHING. JT YOU SHOULD NOT LET YOUR TEMPER AWAY IN THAT E T WILL TELL : ARE ANGRY ALWAYS + BEFORE YOU STRIKE. victor in the recent unpleasantness) : YES, R COUNT FORTY, BEFORE HE STRIKES CAN LICK HIM. Mama CARRY YOU YOU cou Tommy (the AND HE'D BET A FELLOW THA “So, Mr. Rosenheimer, | can nefer give you enuff danks for dat. And now vat is de dowery ? “Vat is de dowery “Yes; how much comes midt mine own sweet Becky ?” “ How much money ?” “Sure!” “Vell, L nefer wouldt haf beleefed dat of mine fren's son— dat he shall vant money, but I tell you I gif her goot money.” “Sure, but how much comes from de dowery ?” “T gif her blenty.” “ How much is blenty, Mr. Rosenheimer ?” “ Anyvay, one tousand dollar _ “One tousand dollars?” “One tousand dollars. Is dat too much ?” The young man reached for his hat and shoved back his chair. “* Meese Moses faser, Abraham Moses, shall gif tree tousand dollars, and he say he is the richest clothing man in de Bowery. “Who toldt you dat ?” “Mine bosom fren’, who is marrying de oser Meese Moses.” “Tam sure he vill nefer gif such a price.” “ He is saying dat he is the richest man in the clothing peez- ness from de New Bowery.” “T vill nefer beleefe dat. vay. “Vat shall I do vith one tousand dollars, ven I haf to buy a reel diamond ring costs me alretty hundred fifty dollars? After dat I haf seven hundred fifty dollars. It is nutting, Mr. Rosenheimer ” (rising to go). “ Vell, how much you vant ?” “ Anyvay fife tousand dollars.” “T shall nefer gif dat money.” “ Othervise I marry Meese Moses.” “ Othervise you kain marry Meese Moses.” “Make it four tousand.” “T shall not pay such adowery. Vell, good-night, Meester Sulzbacher. I gif you two tousand dollars.” “Goot-night, Mr. Rosenheimer. Ven you say twenty-five hundred dollars, I vill say to old Moses dat de dowery ben fife tousand.”” “You vill do dat ?” “Sure, I vill do dat.” “Mine younk fren’, you vill alvays make blenty money, I see dat. Come to my shtore on to-morrow morning.” “ You vill gif dat?” “Tam sure you make moncy. I vill gif dat. Here comes my dear dau’ter, and my vife is calling me from de kitchen,” “ Mine sweet Becky is coming. Goot-night, Mr. Rosen- heimer.” I sell more as him mineself any- Jew p’ EspRit—An intoxicated Israelite. EXAMPLE in liquid measure—To find how much the Khan Tartary really holds. STRATEGY. Reckless Dude: OH, YOU NASTY, SAUCY THING, TO HIDE IN MY BEDROOM! THERE! I'LL BREAK YOUR UMBRELLA, SO YOU CAN'T GO OUT WITHOUT GETTING SOAKED, FOR IT's RAINING LIKE ANYTHING OUTSIDE. Burglar Faints. , comicbooks.com