Life, 1884-06-12 · page 11 of 16
Life — June 12, 1884 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Life Magazine, June 1884: Republican Convention Satire This page satirizes the 1884 Republican National Convention in Chicago, mocking the candidates and their campaigns through exaggerated anecdotes. **Key Figures:** - **James G. Blaine**: frontrunner, criticized for lavish hospitality ("carte blanche") to delegates - **Chester A. Arthur**: incumbent president, portrayed as financially strapped - **William Chandler**: Secretary of Navy, ridiculed for avoiding the convention due to supposed foot/eye ailments and financial troubles **The Satire:** The Indiana delegation's soap wagon bearing "BEFORE USING" and "AFTER USING" portraits of Arthur mocks his transformation from Port Collector to President, implying he's been "cleaned up" like a product. The soap platform jokes that cleanliness appeals to Arthur supporters but not Italian voters. Blaine's hospitality is sarcastically praised as generous, while Arthur's inability to pay fines for arrested campaign workers undermines his boom. The overall tone ridicules the candidates' desperation, corruption, and absurdity of convention politics.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
‘LIFE: THE CONVENTION. Special Pneumatic Tube to LiFe. June 2d, 1884. HEN your correspondent arrived in Chicago last night the excitement had risen to fever heat, and the delegates were wild with delirium. Booms continue to pour in from all sides, the latest being one for Hayes as a dark horse. This is to con- ciliate the New York Suz, whose opposition to Blaine is so uncompromising. A prominent lawyer here tells me that the outlook for the bar was never so promising as at the present, which seems an exceed- ingly plausible statement, as all the leading candidates have - employed the eminent barristers of the Palmer House and other homes of virtue to look after the interests of their canvass. Mr. Blaine has furnished a carte blanche for the delegates at a handsome hall in the city. Why the eminent gentleman whose late literary efforts show such marvellous control over the resources of the English language should call it anything but an “unlimited slate” is beyond my ken; but those who are more intimately acquainted with the inside workings of Mr. Blaine’s canvass state that it is a bid for the French vote. This is probably the truth, although it lacks semblance thereof by coming from the Blaine side of the contest. The delegation of Indiana arrived yesterday in a large soap wagon furnished by Spriggins. The sides were covered with bunting inscribed : “« For President—CuEsTER A. ARTHUR, Vice-President—S. W. Dorsey, Platform—Cleanliness is Next to Godliness, Use Spriggins’s German Laundry Soap.” Beneath these words were two large portraits of Mr. Arthur—one as Collector of the Port and the other as President. labeled respectively : These were ( ‘““BEFORE USING” and ‘AFTER USING.” This had a great effect upon the people. Soap generally does; but it is feared that it will hurt the President's chances in the Italian quarters, where such a platform is not popular. Secretary Chandler has not arrived. By a topographical error in the construction of the country, the United States man-of-war “ Tallapoosa” could not be used to transport the Secretary of the Knavey from Washington to Chicago, and, as Mr. Chandler had hypothecated all his next year’s salary on some dark horse, he had to stay in Washington or walk to the Convention. Owing to an infirmity of his feet which sometimes attacks him—at the same time affecting his eyes with delusions of a duplex nature— he was afraid to attempt the walk, as the roads would be more than usually forked, and he might be lost. However it would affect the happiness of the rest of the world, it would be a bad thing for Mr. Chandler, personally, if he got lost. Hence his absence. To give the gentleman his due, we must say his absence is sincerely felt, as he was unequivocally pledged to support all of the five leading candidates. Mr. Edmunds has just arrived. The thermometer has fallen several degrees. 333 By Cheap Cab Special to LiFe. June 3d, 1884. HE Police Court held an early session to accommodate the delegates this morning. Mr. Blaine’s managers were on hand, and all fines were paid by them. Mr. Arthur's salary not being due yet, he was unable to be on hand to prevent the minions of the law from locking up a few of his ‘‘touters,” as they are called, and his boom has received a serious set back, and indications now point to the nomination of Mr. Blaine on the xteenth ballot. A telegram was received from Mrs. Logan last evening stating that if it was true that Mr. Blaine had given the delegates a carte blanche {or all the resolution they wanted, she wished her managers to order two of them at her expense, and give them to the Convention as a Logan Memorial. They were ordered. The excitement is getting up again by degrees. The Convention was called to order at ten this morning by Senator Sabin, who made a very fine speech. In the course of his remarks he said: ‘* I wish the gentlemen (cheers and applause by the Arkansas delegation), and furthermore, in the words of General (more applause), let us have more (rapturous cheering, waving of handkerchiefs, and cries of Blaine! Blaine! ! Blaine! !!), But, fellow Republicans, what shall I say concern- ing the tariff?” At this point some one in the gallery yelled fire, and every one in the building made a rush for the doors, and in a short time the great hall was empty. Hundreds of spectators were injured, and | one Hayes delegate was killed. All the rest of the delegates had \ previously left the building upon the invitation of Mr, Edmunds, / who is beginning to thaw. This kills the Hayes boom. When the delegates had been coaxed back to the hall again, | Mr. Sabin finished his speech, and the Convention proceeded to organize. Mr. Powell Clayton, an eminent politician from Ar- | kansas,a gentleman of much polish and of exceedingly accommo- dating principles, was nominated by the Blaine faction, much to the disgust of the Arthur, Edmunds and dark horse contingent, who speedily threw their candidate, Mr. John R. Lynch, in the face of the Blainites, defeating them badly. This is regarded as a black eye for the Blaine boom. It is not wonderful that it should beso regarded, for Mr. Lynch is a colored man, and made a very personal speech when intimat- ing that he did n’t want the honor, although his teeth shone out like a Sozodont advertisement at every vote he polled. Personal business became so pressing at this point, that the Convention adjourned until eleven o'clock to-morrow. A bulletin has just been exhibited in front of the 7yibune office announcing that Mr. Hayes has decided not to run, while Mr. Edmunds, after an interview with a prominent police justice, has | left town for ten days. [Private telegram, not frum our correspondent.) June 3d, 1884. Your correspondent was mistaken for a delegate by the Logan forces yesterday. He was heard indulging in song at a late hour last night, and has not yet (7 P. M.) made his appearance. Therefore you need not expect any news to-day, except that one of the Logan Carte's Blanche has “gin out” and his chances are diminishing.