Life — September 27, 1883 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

148 understood that those vulgar brutes in Wall Street smashed the hat of every fellow who went near them. In point of fact they were subsidized by the retail hat trade at a percentage on each hat destroyed. Of course aman could n't go through the street with a crushed hat. It would stain him for life. “ But,” he added, “I would n't be afraid of buying Oceanic Mail. I have a cousin who travelled on one of their boats and he said the meals were really excellent. The waiters were very civil and there were lots of real charming girls on board who did n't get sick the whole way over. I would feel a confidence in Oceanic Mail because, you see, my cousin knows all about it.” “By Jove!” said Agnus, “that’s a good idea ; I will go in for Oceanic Mail!” And he did so the following morning. Iv. O hominem fortunatum !—Quint. AQUEMIN, SHEARUM & CO.’S office was glad- dened before noon by Agnus’ second visit. He whispered nervously to Shearum. “Tam acting on good advice and have deter- mined to do something in Oceanic Mail.” “All right,” said Shearum, “what do, you want to do?” “Well,” re- plied Angus, “you probably know best, having more experience in the mere details. Sup- pose you do some for me?” “Rightenough, but do you want me to buy the stock or sell it?” “Why,” chuckled Agnus, “now you are at fault! I - LIFE: can't sell it, for I've been thinking it all over and I have n’t got any of it, so I must buy it to operate with, you know. Of course I don’t exactly mean to teach you anything—that is, not offensively—but I fancy you know the general run of the business—that is, the mechanical part of it, better than I do; but I want to keep you straight at the start, you see, and I haven't any stock to sell even if I wanted to.” Shearum evidently was crushed, for he simply gazed at Angus and made no reply. “So,” continued Agnus triumphantly, “ perhaps you 'd better buy me a nice lot of it.” Shearum inquired how many shares he wished to give an order for. Agnus had not thought of this, but met the emer- gency with decision. “ How many can you buy to-day?” he asked. Shearum thought he could buy a million if there was no limit as to quantity. “What would they cost ?” asked Agnus. “ Probably thirty odd million dollars,” was the reply. “Oh! but I haven't got so much money.”—This dejectedly. “ How much do you want to invest?” “Say twenty thousand dollars?” “Got a cheque?” “ Here it is.” “Endorse it to us, invested ?”” “Why certainly.” “No limit?” “Yes, twenty thousand dollars.” “T mean as to price? “ Yes—that is, no, certainly—” Do you want all this margin * * * * * * * * * * The scene at the Stock Exchange was worth noting. Oceanic Mail led the excitement. The stock had been dull for months. Suddenly it was taken as fast as it could be offered. Excitement grew. Something was up in that stock. Eager brokers fairly shrieked their advancing bids; others caught the frenzy. Pale men in distant offices, gazing at the quotations, asked what was the cause of the neglected stock suddenly leading the market. Brokers never lack information. A good broker would rather make it himself than to be without it. Vanderbilt was buying it; Jay Gould was caught short of it; the market was oversold, and Russel Sage was covering it; heavy orders from a German syndicate had come over by cable; London bankers were going to put it up to par; it was to be amalgamated with Suez Railway and the Third Avenue Sleeping Car Co. Agnus Fatuus, the innocent cause of the mad hub- bub, was speedily told that his orders were filled and that he was the owner of seven thousand shares. He- grasped Shearum’s hand. “How cheap you have got ‘em!" he said to the broker. “ Why it’s less than three dollars apiece !” Shearum groaned. comicbooks.com