Life — February 1, 1883 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

(Endorsed—As my engagements did not permit, I did not go to ‘Tom's wedding.) He sent me his address in New York and told me that he intended to practise there. The next January I found myself in that alleged metropolis, and having finished my business, I bethought myself of ‘Tom and his wife. But as I looked through my pocket-book for their address, I remembered that I had forgotten to send them any token of affection at the time of their wed- ding. So, I scoured Broadway for a suitable gift. A year ago I had given to Dan Cobb, who was to take his bonny bride to a ranch in Dakota, an ex- ceedingly ornamental plaque ; and I wished to avoid a like mistake this time. To find anything suitable for a pair of impecunious turtle-doves, was a problem for my great legal mind. I was about giving it up in despair when I saw in a neat little window a most attractive array of objects of biyoutrie and vertu. Walking in, I was surprised at the charming taste shown on every side. A dark, gray carpet covered the floor,and the walls were stained so as to form a good back- ground - for numberless brass sconces, and with 4 etchings mirrors frames wrought metal. A carved side- board at the back of the shop was brave with cut-glass and. shining silver. On neat shelves behind the lit- tle counter, were rows of brass inkstands, dragon candles sticks, copper kettles, silver coffee-spoons, and the thousand and one trifles sacred to the hymeneal altar. Ayoung and pretty woman glided towards me, and asked me in a voice full of the music of the South; “Can I show you anything ?” ta & am looking for something to give as a wedding present,” I stammered. “ How does this suit you?” she asked, pointing to a rococo French clock. « “Ido not think that quite suitable,” I said. “TI want to get something useful “For a wedding present?” keeper. “Tt was a foolish fancy of mine, I will, after all, ad- mit. I will take that brass plate with the head of Charlemagne beaten into it. It will give a great deal of pleasure to a young Benedict,who dosn't know where his next dinner is coming from. How much is it?” The angelic shopkeeper mentioned a price which would have pleased Charlemagne, and I walked out of laughed the fair shop- the shop with a polite bow, carrying the plate done up in a neat bundle under my arm. Davidson’s residence proved to be in a very nice apartment house on a side street. “A penniless man always lives well,” I thought, as I shot up in the “ lift.” I was shown into the Doctor's office and smiled at a cheerful skull for a few minutes. ‘The Doctor soon appeared with a most important. air, as if he intended to look into me with a laryngoscope and percuss my chest. As soon as he recognized me, he shouted; “ Why, old Buzzy, Iam almost as glad to see you as if you were a patient.” “Then take this thing off my hands, will you,” I said, handing him the head of Charlemagne. “It’s a foolish thing which I have brought for your wife.” “ Awfully good of you, old man,” he said. “ You'll stay to dinner of course. Mrs. D. is out shopping, but she will be back soon. Dinner of herbs, you know.” He had untied the plate by this time ; he looked at it, turned pale and sank into a chair. “You don’t like it,” I said. “I don’t know what it’s good for. You might shoot at it.” “Tt’s very pretty, very pretty indeed,” said putting it upon the table. getting ready for dinner. with a towel.” “T didn’t like Tom's manner, nor the way in which he received my gift. Of course, nobody wants a brass plate with the head of Charlemagne beaten into it, but the gift-horse shouldn't be looked in the mouth in the donor's presence at least. As I stood brushing my hair, which is really almost bushy, I heard a sound like a kiss in the little parlor. “Dear Tom,” said a sweet voice. to-day !" “Good enough !" said Tom. “A poor man pleased at his wife’s wasting sixty dollars shopping ina single day. What madness !" I thought. I walked into the parlor, and Mrs. Tom stepped for- ward to greet me ; when I came into the light, she start- and covered her face with her hands. Tom gave a great laugh. She was the enchanting little shopkeeper of the pretty shop. “Buzzy,” said Tom, as we lighted up our weeds af- ter dinner, “ you could have knocked me down with a feather when you gave me that Charlemagne. It was our wedding present from my great-aunt Lyman.” z ‘Tom, “ But it’s time for you to be Come and Part your hair “Sixty dollars, MARDI-GRAS. 1883. “THEY do not know the Frenchman's law Who rashly speak of Mardi-Grau ; They do still worse, alack, alas, Who sharply hiss out Mardi-Grass ; And they pronounce down below par, Who hailthe day as Mardi-Grar; - Sweller are they, more lah-de-dah, Who aptly call it Mardi-Grah ; Safer it is, though rarely used—eh ? To print it simply thus :—Shrove Tuesday. Fes. 7TH, comicbooks.com