Judge — March 30, 1929 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

shipping clerk or sawyer, whether iawyer or nployer, You can join the rich and bid You can leave the struggling upper classes With their cars and demi-tasses, if you buy ur niche good-bye ses for the moneyed LAMB CHOPS ON THE HOOF — B. & O. or C. & O., Columbia, Congoleum Marland Oil, Nevada, California Petroleum, Motor Wheel or U.S. Steel or Indian Refining, Anaconda, Kennecott or Chile Copper Mining, Pet Milk, Real Silk, Chrysler c ka, Tel & Tel, Otis El, Atchison-Topeka, tt-Meyers, Gobel, Byers, Standard Oil or Chicle, Buy 'em, voters—Gen'ral Motors, Radio and Nickel! ar ly S & If youl lift up your ears, if you'll open your eyes, r, of gs I will slip you a prize from the guys who are wise! gE] SF RS And torrid are John Gilbert's lips. But these things are not even one-half as hot As the heat in these real red-hot tips, The heat in these real red-hot tips, These tips from the gyps in the know, These tips that are heard from a big-hearted bird Who whispers them sweetly and low: “T know a man who knows a man Who has a wealthy mother Who knows a girl who knows a chap Who has a famous brother J Who knows a man he met aboard A German Railway Carriage Who knows a youth related to The Vanderbilts by marriage Who knows a barber named O'Neill Who every day anoints A man who says that U. S. Steel Js good for twenty points!” TICK!” go the tickers for con-men and slickers, Conservative vicars and school boys in knickers; (The ladies at cuchre talk Stock Market lucre!) For highbrows and Babbitts with middle-class habits; For hustlers and hewers, for go-getting doers, For shofers and loafers and caustic pooh-poohe (The lowliest barge in and buy stuff on margin For old sets and new sets as well as the few sets Whose ancestors landed in old Massachusetts! The National Topic no longer is Liquor, But hark to the siren who sings in the ticker: “Get rich in an hour, a moment, or quicker!” comicbooks.com