Judge — March 2, 1929 — page 18: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE Fuasixe Yourn—Ye gods, Mabel, slap me, quick! The Wolf of Wall Street IT am a modest, unassuming person, possessing neither pro- found mental calibre nor excep- tional intuition. There are thou- sands like me dotting the country from the Atlantic to the I xood fellows, hi diers in the Great Army of Oc- cupation, Yet To am a financial wizard. I have the power of a Morgan, a Durant, a Raskob Mee I can change the course of the stock market in a day; yes, in an hour! Even the oldest: manipu- lators on the “Big Board” (as we professionals dub it) must envy me. I have learned the secret. How do I do it? Simple as A BC! Do you want a rising market, a rip-snort- ing Bull market that will swiftly soar to higher levels? AML TL have to do is sell the stocks I own, and up, up, UP goes the market! Do you want a tumbling, de- clining market, a Bear avalanche of downward prices? All I have to do is buy myself some stocks and down, down, DOWN the market on greased skids! That's me—the Wolf of Wall Street, the Maker of Markets, the Sultan of Stocks! OES —Cynano It’s the woman who pays, and it's usually the woman who the overdrawn account too, February was the — shortest ar, but you didn’t hear anybody living in our steam- heated apartment — complaining about that. month in the First Britisher—Is that Ameri- can heiress athletically. inclined? ‘ond Englishman—Well, she nly knows how to handle her dukes. ce He's so dumb he thinks that “the writing on the wall” i “Watch your hat and coat”! Diven’s Wire—Hello, plumber? Come when you can, but there's really no hurry. —— ij comicbooks.com