Judge — January 12, 1929 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ate. Uncle Harvey’s Past Of course, it isn’t nerally known that Uncle Harvey once a burglar. But he says I can tell about it because he was just a good-natured and happy go-lucky burglar, having merely taken his fund where he found it (And if J know anythi the old i ro just gave out the story so he could get off that crack.) I've often told you about Uncle Harvey's always taking notions well, his ma used to do it too, and he took after her. They used to go to Woolworth’s together, and the old lady would amble along and take all the notions she could get her mitts on—thimbles, spools of thread, hooks and eves, but tons, packages of needles, ete., while Uncle Harvey snuck along behind and took, after her. Well, they worked up te watches that way, and then they decided they were too good for the small time (small time—think quick). So Uncle Harvey's ma would hold up to herself a swell string of pearls, for instance, and wook, Unele Harvey, is this becoming to my particular type? Do you think I could carry it off?" And Uncle Harvey would reply could, ¢ rgishly, “I guess you it, if that house de tective doesn't stick too close.” And sure enough, she would, Of course, during the years he spent as a crook, Uncle Harvey had many exciting experiences, but he says that the best of all was the time he passed the phoney money on a store-keeper —a nickel he found in a pay-sta- tion booth. But all that was long ago, and now Uncle Harvey is as gentle as a lam in the ear. Seriously, though, when he got married, Aunt Abner reformed him—she said she didn't mind his pulling his cracks, but she didn’t: think it was safe to be always fooling around combinations. So now Uncle Harvey won't even take a bath unless it is given to him. In fact, he’s so honest that even his ber trusts him, and will give hair cut without his having a penny in his pocket. This Uncle Harvey is apt to refer to as “cutting his heir off without a cent,” and, in t. xill if some- body doesn’t stop him first. —Jaguira JUDGE LT A BEAD ON HIS BUTTON, BENNY, DIRECTED DANNY THE DIP. Here's still another of those police whoozies of whieh we've had a rash lately. “How can you remember you w stuck up by a dip at exactly five minutes of one this morning?” asked the desk sarge of the plaintive plaintiff. “Well,” argued Mr, Me- Closkey, “I could see the town clock from where 1 was standing and I noticed its hands were in the same position as mine!” What a nut, WHAT @ nut! Hessaxn—IWhat’s the cook up to? “Oh, she’s just following the instructions she read in the telephone book.” comicbooks.com