Judge — October 13, 1928 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

whole world knows / F , ot W to TTS t there Bayer <Ispirin. The name ery tablet, and on the box ; and if it doesn't. Headaches are dispelled by Aspirin. So are colds, and the pain oes with them; even netralgia, ncuri- natism promptly reheved. Get any drugstore—with — proven Physicians prescribe Bayer Aspirin; it does NOT affect the heart s the tral rk of Bayer M. tu Long lester of Salicylicacid “Say It With Scotchograms” The Funniest Book of the Year Contains a dictionary of over 250 words and phrases to use in mak up Scotchograms. Humorous mes- sages for all occasions. Instructions for writing Scotchograms and how to play Scotchogram games. Illustrations by Jefferson Machamer. Its Symphony book alright anc prices sonia dollar. Senate to Judge Publishing Co., 627 West 43rd. St., and yule ghetto copy The Harassing of Habbakuk (Continued from page 8) him awoke. A gallant man, he could not allow the ladies to sub- ject themselves to any” such breeches of etiquette. His eves blazed with his first truly great inspiration! Away to his cabin aced. He tore open his in | venting kit, and his nimble fin- gers busied themselves with slide rules and gimlets, with adzes and awls. Habbakuk designed and invented as never befor And ten minutes later he rushed back on deck ... flushed with the thrill | of achievement. The clever fel- low had constructed a breeches buoy in which the most conven- tio of ladies could be rescued with decorum... a breeches buoy in the form of a skirt! Grandaddy was the last to be rescued, But before he was saved, with one grand flourish he threw his “Little Jack Horner Ballot Box Stuffer” into the sea Such an invention no longer merited his consideration. The remainder of his life would de vote to the perfection of the Fe- male Breeches Buoy. Alas, with the morning ne the papers announcing the elec tion of Rutherford Hayes. It | was with a shudder that Habba | kuk recollected his very foolish wager! Reluctantly, but true to his word, he threw away his razor. Weeks passed; his beard grew, and with it grew tl tragedy of his life. Before long his whiskers began to. interfer: with his inventing. They swished across his blue-prints and blotted his inky drawings. When he sewed on the skirt, he was for ever sewing his beard into. the fabric. They got covered with grease, and hours every day were wasted in their laundering. At the end of the year he acknowl ed defeat and gave up his cherished career; the breeches buoy was never completed. His ambitions — crushed, Habbakuk | ended his days in a circus. WEAR MARRIED ATLAS ANIMUS ASKEW TOTAL HERALD MAN. Before Shaving HINDS CREAM After shaving, Does your skin Feel dry, Stretched, and tight As a drumhead? Want to have that Nice relaxed feeling, And look well groomed In the bargain? After you shave, Simply rub on Hinds Cream Till it dries in. Borrow the wife’s Bottle and try it Or send coupon, Before you lather, rub in Hinds Cream vigor- prised how it softens the beard! sther right over nity C . smooth, g, rub in a little more Hinds Cream until your fine gers cling, Your skin will feel soft and re- laxed all day. Afler Shaving HINDS CREAM Ou ar.inc..s9020 —— > LENIN & FINK, Ine. Ss Depe. 958. Sole Distributors Zz Mloombeld, N. J Please send me a sample bottle of Hinds Honey & Almond Cream, so I can enjoy a smooth shave foronce (This coupon not good after October, 1929) “Shave your face but save your skin