Judge, 1928-10-06 · page 8 of 36
Judge — October 6, 1928 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains three satirical pieces from an early 20th-century American humor magazine: **"Dog's Life"** (top cartoon): Depicts customs officials interrogating French travelers about smuggling a "flea circus"—a contemporary novelty act where fleas were trained to perform. The joke mocks both overzealous customs enforcement and the absurdity of the flea circus itself as contraband. **Courtroom cartoon** (bottom left): Shows a magistrate's court with a driver appearing for a "murder" conviction fined $5—likely referencing early automobile accidents, which were novel, deadly, and treated with surprising leniency. The caption sardonically suggests courts on every corner, mocking inadequate traffic law enforcement. **"Advice to Young Poets"** (right column): Offers tongue-in-cheek guidance to aspiring writers, praising Romantic poets (Swinburne, Byron, Dante, Shelley) while satirizing impractical bohemianism—starving in garrets, excessive posing—before the punchline: eventually you'll abandon art for mundane insurance sales. It mocks both pretentious poets and the economic reality crushing artistic ambition.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE DOG’S LIFE Ar tin Cestoms—None o° yer lip, nox! ! Youse Frenchies know darn well y’ can't smuggle no flea circus into this country! “Guilty of murder fined $5) Next casi Why not have a magqistrate’s court on every corner? o The 100 Best Plays in Football VI.—The Running Measles, or Why Girls Stay Home. This play is said to have origi nated in the old Norse custom of cracking nuts in bed and was first used in this country by old Gil Hooley, one-time coach of the Detroit Athletics. It was one of the many trick p haps the worst ys, and per » with which the Oklahoma nine was able to establish the record it held un disputed in the seasons of 1772-4 G-8, of never having scored a sin- gle point on its opponents and having lost every match for three years straight. The play is originated by the right guard, who takes the ball from the second baseman. While the referce isn't looking he pushes his puck through the center wicket and onto the green for a birdic seven, and before you can. say Jack Robinson, there is the ball, neatly planted between the goal posts. If the weather is clear and the track fast. it is often better to di- versify this play by putting in a pinch of bitters and a teaspoon ful of sugar, though the results are usual ust as fatal. —Ricuarp S, Warrace Advice to Young Poets Study the marvelous meter of Swinburne, Madly carouse ‘til the checks of your kin burn, Dwell in a garret, unfurnished and smelly, Delve into Dante and dip into Shelley. Pose in) apparel that’s ultra Byron Proffer your Muse as an aid to the cl ic World that could use a terrestrial tonic! Weep with the willows and sigh with the zephyrs, Sing of the billows, the sky and the heifers. Suffer and hunger to test your en- durance Then get a job selling bonds or insurance! —Artier L. Lirpaann comicbooks.com i | j i } |