Judge, 1928-09-08 · page 13 of 36
Judge — September 8, 1928 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page satirizes early 1920s American society through two pieces: **Top Section ("High Hat"):** A humorous first-person essay about enjoying bed rest, interrupted by an aggressive newspaper editor ("Walter Burns"—likely referencing a demanding journalistic type) demanding copy. The narrator is then called as a witness in the "Night Club investigation," apparently related to Texas Guinan's speakeasy. The Q&A mocks Prohibition-era hypocrisy: witnesses deny visiting clubs while admitting they drank there constantly. The joke hinges on the absurd contradiction between law and actual behavior during illegal alcohol sales. **Bottom Cartoon:** Shows a man in bed surrounded by liquor bottles, reciting a ridiculous definition of liquor as "water in which food has been boiled"—another Prohibition joke. A woman holds what appears to be a ledger, likely documenting his consumption. The speech bubble references "two bacardis, three stingers, six tom collins, martinis and seven highballs every hour." Both pieces mock Prohibition enforcement's futility and widespread public defiance through drinking.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
I get a great kick out of being “sick in bed.” At least for a day, or two anyway. The time this tlways seems to me as “time out’ not from the world, but from life itself. 1 have a lazy detached feelin my bed spent only were floating hig space and as I read my news pers and magazines it all seems a million away—and silly and trivial. An Olympian contentment steals over me and I drift into the arms of Morpheus with a happy smile upon my face. The steady ringing of ‘a bell suddenly sounds as if from afar. It gets louder. What! gines on Olympus? iniles very Fire en- No, it’s a long distance call from the earth. I awake enough,to hear the angry ice of the “Walter Burns” of toasting the wire. “I don’t give a damn if you have got the grip, Where in hell's my copy?” “T wouldn't know about that,” I murmur, stif A faint sputtering is heard, then a thin quict voice. “Listen, Moron a : {NOF a ye O 1 \WGH JUDGE and Mock! The copy is in by five o'clock or the page is out!” There is silence. God, what a hard man! frantically through the and magazines taking copy. TL have been subpenaed in the Night Club investigation. What a cross examination! Q. You have been in the Euro- pean Club? A. Never. Q. Are you sure? is on their club list. A. So is George and) Abraham didn't you subpana them? T run papers notes for Your name Washington Lincoln. Why LNA T= Q. They're dead! Have ever been in Texas Guinan’s? A, Many times. Q. Hy liquor there? A. Oh, many times! you ever bought you (Great excitement.) Q. You will swear to this? A. Sure, but first ok up liquor in the dictionary and you will sce that it says “water in which been boiled.” I've had soup in Guinan’s many times! ( Pandemonium.) I read Edgar Davis’ quarter page advertisement. in’ all the newspapers explaining why he put half a million dollars into “The Ladder”... in his ad, Mr. Davis says, “We see life about us full of suffering, seeming inequalities and injustice.” If Mr. Davis no ticed that, it’s funny didn’t no- tice all those old buildings de- voted to charity, or the poor dis- tricts, or the public parks. Half a million would have helped end in relieving that sufferin (Continued on page 3 food has BACARDIS — THR, ; 1S LIX TOM COLLINS MARTINIS AND SEM BALLS EVERY Work D EN ) Ay — comicbooks.com