Judge, 1928-08-18 · page 13 of 36
Judge — August 18, 1928 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine: "How to Get Out of Getting a Motorcycle Cop Ticket" This satirical article mocks 1920s traffic enforcement by proposing absurd methods to evade motorcycle police issuing speeding tickets. The humor relies on escalating ridiculous tactics: **Method A (Wisecrack)**: Use charm and flippant humor—feigning ignorance ("I no spik Engleesh!"), telling jokes, laughing hysterically—to amuse the officer into not writing a ticket. **Method B (Folding Bar)**: Distract the cop by deploying a portable steering wheel or similar device. **Method C (Portable Steering Wheel)**: Shows officers in a slapstick scene, apparently losing control of their motorcycles. The article also references immunity for politically connected figures like Jimmy Walker and Al Smith (NYC politicians), and mentions "Herbie Hoover"—likely Herbert Hoover, then-Secretary of Commerce. The satire critiques both traffic laws' inconsistent enforcement and the era's casual disregard for traffic safety, while poking fun at everyday citizens' creative rule-breaking during Prohibition-era America.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
| IMIG. This week's stereopticon lee- ture, for no reason at all, will be on “How to get out of getting a ticket fron, a motoreyele cop” or “How to get out of getting a ticket from a motorcycle cop.” Havir braved the perils of the Afr jungles, hunted wild game in Yon kers, climbed the steppes of Rus- sia (and fallen down again), crossed the Atlantic Ocean in a hot-water bottle, and Fifth Avenue in a non-stop flight, I feel that 1 can speak not only crossed JUDGE ested in “How to get out of get ting a ticket from a motorevele cop.” Method B. freely but authoritatively (mind you) on the subject of “How to get out of getting a tic from a motoreycle cop.” Before start- “ing my lecture on “How to get out of getting a ticket from a motor- eyele cop,” it might be only: fai to warn my readers that this en- tire page is devoted to the sub- ject of “How to get out of get- ting a ticket from a motoreyele cop.” Of course, there are some people who are lucky enough to be immune (a. & n. Having im- munity from §e.; (n.) i. person (f. munis ex empt from public burden), such by poison, contagion, the name of O'Brien, Cassidy, Cudahy, O"Hoo- lihan, O'Hara, ete., or if you hap- pen to be Jimmy Walker or Al Smith, or if you happen to have Bobbe Arnst with you. — Thes¢ people naturally won't be inter- persons The Folding Bar Method A. cose Method: The minute you hear the words “Pall over to the coib!” light Wisecrack or Jo- i Murad and assume a carefree, nonchalant attitude. and when the “You were goin’ forty- n hour,” just murmur, in a flippant man- Well, esn't officer says,” two miles “Oh, ¥ ner and then add brisky, what's it to you?” If this ¢ do the trick and he yells, “Lemue see yer license!" wink at him and say, “LT no spik Engleesh!" By this time he ought to be in a rol- licking good humor, but if he’s a d nut to crack, start laughing hilariously and ask him if. he's ard the story about Margot As quith. If he begins to get purple at this point and mutters through clenched teeth, “You're get a nice big summons! singing for me!" going to begin vly, “Summons waiting and start the car care If he has his foot on the running board, this movement will probably spill him into the street, so if he starts shooting after you stop quickly yell, “Don't Il marry your daugh- ter If you haven't: got hin giggling by this time, a threatening manner and “Say! Do you know what day lessly. and she this is When he looks blank, yell, “This is Saint) Swithin’s Day If this doesn't move him, look at him straight in. the eye and mutter, “If you give me a ticket I'M) vote for Herbic Hoover!” If this fails, turn to (Continued on page 31) comicbooks:com