Judge, 1928-07-14 · page 8 of 36
Judge — July 14, 1928 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page from Judge contains humorous satirical pieces about modern restaurant dining and Hollywood's film industry. **"How to Recognize Your Waiter"** mocks the chronic restaurant-goer's difficulty identifying waiters between visits. The satire employs increasingly absurd "methods": measuring the waiter's nose, hiring an artist to sketch him, fingerprinting the entire staff, and finally—the punchline—simply eating at a cafeteria where you serve yourself. The cartoon illustrations show exaggerated dining scenarios. The piece satirizes both the vanity of frequent diners and the impersonal nature of restaurant service. **"No Longer Recognizable"** is a brief joke dialogue between an Author and Poet. The Author laments writing a story for movies five years ago, paid in advance, yet never knowing if it was produced. The Poet's closing remark ("There's no fool like an oiled fool") suggests the author was foolish to accept payment without follow-up—satirizing Hollywood's opacity and the powerlessness of writers in the film industry. Both pieces use humor to critique early 20th-century urban leisure culture and entertainment industry practices.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
How to Recognize Your Waiter The chronic diner-out and fre quenter of restaurants and night clubs often finds it dificult to ree- ognize his waiter, once that dis appearing marvel has brought the Some timid souls shudder iferously bel “in the hope that the r pn owill hear the call and come on the run, For such folks the following methods tsure length of your wait ers nose from bridge to tip. Measure distance between waiter’s s. Mark your findings on a rt, together with Bertillon urements, color of hair and eyes. Refer to chart when in need of extra butter. | 2. Bring prominent artist to Farurn—I can't help it, children; as you know, your mother ner swith you; While walter ts once shook hands with Lindbergh. aking your order, have artist sketch him, Prop sketch against water bottle for future reference. 3. Secure ink pad for 10c at any stationer’s. When giving wait- 8 bee ‘ er your order, secure complete set of right) and left-hand finger: | prints. — Record these on your menu. When in need of further attention or service, notify head waiter to line up his men. Pro- ceed to finger-print entire staff until your own waiter is discov- cred and shyly steps forth. | 4. This is known as the “aver- ages’ system, and while not in fallible, frequently works. If in need of your waiter in a Hun- garian restaurant, simply eall out “Morris!” In a French restau- | rant shout “Pierre!” In a Ger- man restaurant “Otte !* urant “Andropop: Pullman diner surest method of all— | cat at a cafeteria and serve your self! —Antiveer L. Lieesans No Longer Recognizable Author—I wrote the movies five years « paid me for it in advance. Poet—Was it ever produced? cluthor—How should I know? Sympatuetic Strancer—Why are you erying, you poor darling? There's no fool lik an oiled “At my uncle. Last him for moneyand the ®*88**! gave me five cents!" fool. L—__ comicbooks.com