Judge, 1928-07-14 · page 18 of 36
Judge — July 14, 1928 — page 18: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page parodies classified advertisements through darkly absurdist humor typical of early 20th-century satire. The fake ads mock both commercial exploitation and human folly: **Key satires:** - "Artists Wanted" mocks political vandalism (adding whiskers to billposters—likely defacing public figures) - "Learn to Swim" jokes about a canoe company whose real business is "grappling irons" (retrieving drowned bodies) - "For Gray Hair" sells a worry-list booklet, then deliberately doesn't send it—creating the promised worry - "Bomb Making at Home" references anarchist violence concerns of the era - "Free Trial" darkly plays on electrocution as capital punishment **Top cartoon:** Tests "Indestructo Luggage" by having men throw it violently—visual pun on destructive testing. **Bottom cartoon:** "Weighing at the House of David" depicts figures on a scale, likely mocking a circus sideshow or health fad. The satire targets advertising's manipulative promises and contemporary anxieties about crime, immigration, and industrial dangers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE Classified Ads (The Kind That Fool You) Artists Wanted Artists who are experienced in drawing whiskers on billposter portraits are wanted by the au- thorities in order to explain how they get that way. Can you sketch in pencil on tablecloths? Even if you can, don't. Break yourself of these and other nasty habits. Eat yeast and overcome your nervousness. Song Writers Stop trying to write songs and xo to work. We teach you how. Helpus Employment Agency. Learn to Swim Buy a canoe and you'll have to. Quick turnovers mean profit for us at a saving to you. Our trademark on the bottom of eve canoe where all can see it. T is only a side line with us, our main line is grappling irons. For Gray Hair There's nothing like worry. Send 25 cents for our booklet, giving 1,001 things to worry about. Some quite unusual, and which you would be unable to think of by yourself. Daily re- minder makes it impossible for you to skip one day even. This ily reminder lists a number of common worries arranged accord- ing to season. Each day you check off the things to worry about the following day, and thus nothing is forgotten. (Special: After we get your two bits, we won't send you the booklet, and that will give one more thing to worry No extra charge for th Write today. dress on request. Free Trial Kill somebody and the State will try you free of charge. The only charge is one of electricity. Learn Bomb Making at Home Why toss bouquets at your ene- inies and rivals? Complete course, Chicago method. Not respon- sible for losses among pupils while learning. —R. C. O'Brien She—I've skated for hours on end. He—Tsch! Tsch! Why don't you get someone to teach you? “I want to get some of the Indestructo Luggage you advertised, and I brought these men along to test it for me.” comicbooks.com