Judge — June 23, 1928 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE GAGS TO RICHES Two Reformed By R. C. O'Bries Truck-Drivers Clash (“No More Naughty Words ? vi Be 4 From Truck Drivers, Proposed ou lave to ’ , Cit Ord ce.’ Evening | When they blindfold you for ( A ail a the Old Gold test. and you can't quite decide and they try to hurry your decision, be nonchalant ight a Murad. Stop, L say! Just come right straight back here and look 7 what you've done, you mean old Come back here and thing. you just look! “Why, vou great big bully, vou Hollywood Papers Please Copy | just did it yourself! [ts every | Movie title writers wanted. Lede bit your fault. so there!” The movies need them, There is j= “Oh-h-h. vou big fibber, it isn't : ‘ t a great demand for them. Any- | any such thing, and Um going to it a A | | hody who has seen movies knows tell your boss on you, you just | ] that. We teach you this trade, I| wait and see!” and furnish you with complete “Well, T don't care, Vl just equipment, including scissors, be- sides. You do not have to be | humorous—and you don't. even have to have a typewriter know how to type. All you have to know is how to paste, and, if a tell your boss first, vou old smarty, and Tl tell a policeman too, and then where'll you be? Smarty, smarty, smarty had a pa-a-ar ! “LT think you're mean! 1 think you don't like to get your fingers you're the meanest man in’ the Wi | sticky, you can get somebody to world! Meanie, meanie, meanie, — | | do that’ for you even. Send for meanie, meanie!” | | } our course in clipping today, 2 I know what—let’s get out | There is no charge. Where we and see what's hurt, shall w | come in is in sharpening scissors. 9 Mavbe it isn’t so very—wery bad } We also sell ‘em. ‘Time was when after all!” a a humorist had to have a good AT “AIL rightie, maybe we had * ian memory; now all he needs is a tter, do you think? ... Oh, good pair of shears. Write , look! You just bent my fender Na for our prospectus and you will won OA a teensy censy weensy bit Hit write tomorrow for the movies. = “And you just made an ittic i The Sharpedge School of Scissors vo wittie bittie dent in my hubeap, | Grinding and Movie Titling. | that’s all!” Hh] = ~ “Oh, goodie-woodie! ‘Then we | aren't going to fight after all, are i i When Dreams Come True n xeon . a | I dreamt 1 dwelt in marble halls; “Course not. Everything can i So wide, so cold, so tall; be all fixed in a jiffy-wiffy as i (Apartment houses, as you know, soon as we get back to the garage! it Have marble in the hall). Let's kiss and make up, shall we All wightie. ... Oh, I'm so glad! 1 just hate to fight, don't your” And that is not surprising; The wife had locked me out all night. I found upon arising. Just simply loathe it! Well, T must be buzzing along to the | I dreamt IT dwelt in marble halls; i] i i piers.” “And I must toot along to my | Many radio broadcasting sta- | subway excavation—the boss is a tions are competing with cach perfect old bear if I'm late!” other. In our airshaft, anyway. ~ —Jaquita Ask Any Employer Many hands make light of He who laughs last is in a work, The Miracle dollar-ten seat. comicbooks.com