Judge, 1928-05-19 · page 16 of 36
Judge — May 19, 1928 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a satirical retelling of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears" that comments on evolving gender roles and modern courtship in the 1920s (Judge's era). **The Setup:** Goldilocks, rather than being an innocent intruder, is a sophisticated young woman who manipulates three eligible bachelor bears into domesticity. One bear is named "Heywood" (unclear reference); another is Sydney, dismissively called a "paluka" (slang for an unsophisticated person). **The Satire:** The joke centers on how Goldilocks—representing the modern woman—colonizes the bears' space and dictates their behavior. She demands they shave, bathe regularly, and surrender personal autonomy ("it's mine"). **Social Commentary:** This mocks anxieties about women's increasing independence and authority in relationships. The bears' bewildered resignation to her takeover suggests male anxiety about female empowerment. The sidebar joke about Wanda's inheritance ("does she have to go and live there to get it?") reinforces themes of women pursuing financial security through strategic relationships. The cartoon satirizes both the "new woman" and male vulnerability to her demands.
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entreated the Big Bear in his big se ADAM. voice, “don't, I beseech you, run away.” “Horses,” replied Goldilocks over a shoul- der known not only for its whiteness and its texture, but for a certain devastating dimple. “Madam,” said the Middle-sized Bear in his middle- xed or bearytone voice, “you sce, it's like this. We bears are a lonely cnough lot. Now, if you wouldn't mind lightening our lives, we'd be happy, Madam, to a lot more of you around the pl vet me get this straight,” interrupted Goldilocks. “You boys are certainly the bearies ing that I visit with you for a whil “And no offense, M n. You are an extremely per- sonable girl, if I may say so, and we are taken with your looks. You can’t persuade ine that you are either con- servative or Victorian, so why not?” “After all, why not?” said Goldilocks. “E a bear you show excellent judgment. Say I'm home for the night. Orange juice, coffee and two pieces of thin toast for breakfast and lay off the por- ridge. Then she went up to the little bear's room to throw out his personal effects and rearrange it to her own liking. Are you suggest- as it were?” > more— 14 Witanp—Wanda’s uncle has left her $5,000 a year in | perpetuity. “Fine! But does she have to go and live there to get it?” John The Intimate Life of a “A sweet cookie!” “A hot hones middle-sized voi “A by wench, I'll bet,” said the Little Bear, who had a high tenor voice and was called Sydney, “like all these Erskine palukas.” Possibly the Little Bear was prejudiced. The other two shouted him dow “Now get this, boys,” said Goldilocks, I'm in the said the Big Bear in his big voice. tid the Middle-sized Bear in his ‘as lo u've got to shave at least once day... . I'm fed up with all this shaving,” growled the Big Bear in his big bass voice. “I'm going to grow a beard.” “Don't be an Airedale, Heywood. Another thing— you Middle-sized Bear will have to practice your somewhere else. It's inexpressibly foul. And you the little Bear, “don’t you know by now that that isn’t your room any morc?” It's mine. Ii you don't stop popping in at odd moments you're going to lose an eye!” “Look here—" said the three bears. comicbooks.com