Judge, 1928-02-25 · page 19 of 36
Judge — February 25, 1928 — page 19: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This article by Susie Snoop and Sarah Snapp satirizes both marriage advice literature and male attitudes toward matrimony. Readers answer personality questionnaires grouped by topic—ranging from absurd violence ("kick a lady in the face," "push your wife off a dock") to mundane domestic scenarios (eating crackers in bed, preferring a car to a wife). The satire's point: the "key chart" results are uniformly discouraging. Nearly every outcome advises against marriage entirely, with escalating hostility in Key Number 2 (literally suggesting murder). The illustrated women shown represent "girls you will marry in order of their appearance"—a cynical joke about inevitable matrimonial disappointment. This reflects 1920s-era skepticism about marriage as a social institution, mocking both earnest self-help prescriptions and the period's crude gender relations. The joke is that no man, regardless of answers, should marry at all.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Write Your Own Prescription for a Happy Marriage | An Article by | SUSIE SNOOP } and SARAH SNAPP (Reading time [Eoitor’s Note incidentally sold over six million, ¢ estions for picking out a hus their turn. Heigho! It’s a small world?) A his, and here is the way it is done. Read the following groups of questions, that is if you are able to read, and answer them. Take the groups where the majority of your answers are “ If the groups are, say, 2, 4 and 5, read Key Chart 245 and you'll be surprised! N MAN) should) choose a wife whose nature is harmonious to Group No. 1. Would you kick a lady in the face? Do you expect your wife to support you? Would you push your wife off a dock? Would you take your wife’s Pekinese out for a walk? Would you meet your wife in Macy’s basement? Group No. 2. Would you like thirteen children? Would you hit a child on the head with a croquet mallet? Would you kiss your wife on Ash Wednesday? Would you prefer an automobile to a wife? Would you allow your wife to eat crackers in bed? Don't read this and save ten minutes) In an article published in last week's issue, which the authors Liberty Number of Judge How # Choose 2 WIFE ve the girls a list the men folks have Group No. 3. like How would you five wives? Have you ever been examined for Insanity? Which would you rather have—a radio or a wife? Would you hit your wife with a goldfish bowl if she wasn’t looking? Would you love her in December as you did in May? Key Number 1 You are the kind of man that should never Ais ; WE tay z tr marry. By all means avoid marriage. Ff ERE are the girls you will vey Number 2 < marry in order of their ‘y Number 2 . appearance Your type of man should never marry. If you are already married shoot your wife, because you'll never be happy. Don't marry. Key Number 4. Key Number 5. Key Number 3. Avoid marriage as if it were the plague. Don't marry! Don’t: marr: Don’t marry. 17 Number 6, comicbooks.com