Judge — October 22, 1927 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE The Seats of the Mighty When Oscar Whipple was twenty-one years old he left his father’s Peoria Pennant factory and came to New York to become an author. No Rotary Clubs for me, thought Oscar. I'll be an intellectual. So he rented a Greenwich Village attic and, though for three years he cooked over a gas jet, wore a black hat and let his hair grow long, no one would buy any of his stories. Why is it, thought Oscar, that I > Hundreds of people in New York sell stories and ride around in autos and have luncheon every day at the Algonquin Hotcl, while I can’t seem to sell a darn thing I write. Then Oscar had an idea. I'll go to the Algonquin and spy on these intellectual celebrities, thought he. I'll find out what they talk about and from the words of wisdom I pick up I'll write a novel that will startle the world. So off he went to the Algonquin. Well, after much maneuvering, Oscar found himself in the dining-room of that great gathering place, and when no one was looking he slipped under the table and wormed his way along the floor until he was beneath the very table where all the celebrit had gathered to dine and discuss the Arts. Now, thought Oscar, trembling with excitement, I'll write down everything they say. and getting out his pad and pencil he began to write. “Listen, Jack, how about that two bucks you borrowed last week?” . . . Pass the bread, will ya! ... Whose got a cigarette? . . + Oh, boy, pipe that flapper in the red dress over by the win- am so unsuccessfu S ay be a Lucy Stoner, but— , Bill, can ya get me a ¥ to some show tonight? ... Whose got a cigarett . And as true as I am sitting here I got Denver clear as a bell... A cup of coffee, waiter... . It’s a great little bus and I wouldn’t sell it for... Honest, Mark, I got a birdie on the fourth and a par on the sixth and seventh.” Messotini—TI feel like the DUC. “Don’t shoot! Sketcnes From A Pappep Cetn Grorce—How are you f su Rustic—What are you doing? » Prince or Wares—Following the hounds. ling, Benito? That might be Levine!” comicbooks.com