Judge, 1927-07-23 · page 12 of 36
Judge — July 23, 1927 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "High Hat" - Judge Magazine Satire This page satirizes a boastful Californian tourist aboard a yacht on the Hudson River near Poughkeepsie. The character embodies the era's stereotype of Western nouveau riche—arrogant, condescending toward "effete" Easterners, and increasingly drunk on champagne cocktails while bragging about the Golden West. The joke's payoff: when Columbia University's rowing team wins a race, the narrator abandons his contempt and enthusiastically joins in celebrating, waving Columbia's blue-and-white colors. The satire mocks both the Californian's insufferable superiority and the narrator's sudden patriotic conversion based on a college sports victory. The "field-glass flask" product parody and cocktail recipe are typical Judge advertisements disguised as editorial content. The page dates to the college rowing season (likely early 1900s), when such competitions held significant social prestige among upper-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE AIG Just a song at twilight... about 8 P. M. up at Poughkeepsi ... “California, here they come !” aed But I’m jumping ahead of my story picture a yacht steaming up the Hudson, full of beautiful gels, the boat, not the river, and included among seagoing the male passengers, a bird from California... one of those bim- hoes who talks in sub-titles and looks down upon us of the effete East as poor worms . . . picture him raving all one sunlit’ day GHG _HAT- News item—The last gasp in- vented by Judge, Jr—The field-glass flask—Boy, how you can see things! about the Golden West and the a men among men who spring L from its serl, pardon me, soil . . . his eloquence incréases, along with the number of cham- pagne Tom Collins’ he consumes, until along about the time of the races s a secret mutiny has been formed for the sole pur- pose of pushing Columbia, the gem of the Hud son, the old oaken bucket, was ereeping up and up and up, and when they shot out from under the old railroad bridge she was clear! ‘ I've never seen a prettier sight in my life! ... in that mo- ment Columbia became a college! ph As the old) Blue and White romped home a winner, we began singing, “California, here they come!” and we never stopped, except for swallows, until day- break! . . . And hereafter any Californian starts yelping about the wonderful West I won't say a word.... Til just wave a little Blue and White flag in his face! fp Speaking of Columbia, Dick Hunter of him overboard! fh And then the race! ... Seven Geneva, Illinois, sends in a very delicious recipe. . How’ve you bee » Juice of flashing shells slip- ping through the water in an unbroken silence except for the yapping of the son of—the West at my side ...and Cali- fornia in the lead! ... I grabbed a champagne bottle firmly by the neck, determined to launch the native son on a journey to cter- nity, when... Ye gods Did my eyes deceive me? half a lime and an equal amount of syrup. Keep your mind on the race, lads! Add the squeezed peel and mash it all up with a spoon, .. . Add three or four fingers of Bourbon or rye and a dash of bitters... . Stir well, Add two lumps of ice and fill with syphon. Wishing you a Merry Christ- mas, I am, Yours sincerely, Judge, Jr. comicbooks.com