Judge — February 19, 1927 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Keeping Cool It was a sleepy village, and its fire brigade was anything but up to date. One night a fire was an- nounced by the violent ringing of the alarm bell, and the sleepy arrived at the scene of find the burning mass of smoke. No from the out- brigade the action to building a flames were visible side. The captain made a careful survey. Then he lit his pipe and started to smoke. “We'd better leave it alone and let it burn up a bit,” he said. “Then we'll be able to see what we are doing.”/ —Everyvnopy’s 228 Absent - Minded Professor— Waiter, half an hour ago I or- dered a steak. Hav it—have I had order it? you forgotten it—or didn’t I —ANSWERS ed shellfish were un- earthed by workmen digging in Piceadilly Circus. We had. an idea that the reason why so many workmen dig in Piccadilly Circus would ultimately become appar- ent. —Lonvon Opinion Fossilised S28 Patient—Doctor, how can I ever repay you for your kindness to me? Doctor — By order, or cash. cheque, mone} —Perarsons SAe A morning paper declares that British boxers know little of the art of self-defence. Yet they scem to know the ropes. —Passtxe Siow Ls “Why is it that you have broken off your engagement, Alice?” asked her fair friend. “Oh, my dear! He told me he was connected with the movies, and the very next day I saw him “He stood decom po a statue The viangied When 1Sat Down At the Piano But When I Started to Play!~ RTHUR had just played “The Ros- ary.” The room rang with ap- plause. Then to the amazement of all my friends, I strode confidently over to the piano and sat down, “Jack is up to his old tricks,” somebody chuckled. The crowd laughed. They were all certain that I couldn't play a single note. “Can he really play?" I heard a girl whisper to Arthur. “Heavens, no,” Arthur exclaimed. “He never played a note in all his life.” I decided to make the most of the sit- uation. With mock dignity I drew out a silk handkerchief and itly dusted off the piano keys. Then I rose and gave the revolying piano stool a quarter of a turn. The crowd laughed) merrily. Then I started to play. Instan tense silence fell_o played the few bars of T heard friends sat breathless—spel A Complete Triumph! As the last notes of the Lichestriiume died away, the room resounded with a sudden roar of applause. I found myself surrounded by. excited faces, Everybody was exclaiming with delight plying me with rapid questions “Tack! Why didn’t you tell us you could. play, like that?” “Where did you learn ?—"Wh teacher Pick Your ge MENG: smleves Instrument t “Tre Piano "Cello ied. “And just Organ Harmony and J 2 short while ago Violin Composition couldn't “playa Drums and Sight Singing Traps Ukulele Banjo (Tenor, Guitar Plectrum Hawaiian an _ accomplished or 5-String) Steel Guitar | pianist. “You've Mandslin Harp heen studying for Clarinet Cornet mee f can tell.’ Flute Plecole studying only a Saxophone Trombone ee bite Tin Voice and Speech Culture | sisted. “I kept. it Automatic Finger Control | a secret so that I Piano Accordion could, surprise you folks.”” as your uit your kid- * faughed Arthur, himself How I Learned to Play Without a Teacher Then T cents a day! tered the special talent for mu Play Any Instrument Send for Our Free Booklet and Demonstration Lesson Thousands Instruments. supplie« Uv. = SCHOOL OF MUSIC New York City U. S. School of Music 22 Brunswick Bldg., New York City. send me your free hook, “Must history to learn.” “Now would you believe it, fell from the fifth storey. and weren't killed?” “Who told you?” —Avssir Soe “T wish I had lived three hun- “Why I shouldn’t have had so much —Bvew Hemor, Madrid BOW LEGS? THs GARTER (Pat’d) Makes Trousers Hang Straight If Legs Bend In or Out. Self Adjustable. Free Booklet—Plain Sealed Envelope The T. GARTER CO, PA yn cntna How to Gbtain A Perfect Looking Nose My latest improv comicbooks.com