Judge, 1926-12-04 · page 13 of 36
Judge — December 4, 1926 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains two satirical pieces: **1. The "S.O.S." Radio Broadcast (top):** A mock emergency report about a confused old man (clearly Santa Claus) found wandering and incoherently reciting an absurdly endless Christmas wish list from children. The joke satirizes both children's materialistic greed and the commercialization of Christmas—the list includes everything from electric trains to radios to real horses, reflecting 1920s consumer culture excess. The cartoon below shows exhausted delivery workers overwhelmed by Christmas shopping, mocking how commercialism has burdened working people rather than spreading cheer. **2. "A Modern Christmas Carol" (bottom):** This story parodies Dickens's *A Christmas Carol*, introducing "poor little Aloysius De Vantervale"—a wealthy child sitting in his father's luxury drawing-room drinking cocktails. The irony is clear: he's materially privileged but spiritually empty, suggesting that wealth and excess create unhappiness. The piece critiques how even privileged children have lost genuine Christmas spirit to materialism and adult excess (his drinking). Both pieces mock 1920s consumer culture and its corruption of Christmas's spiritual meaning.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE J-L-E, official - broadcasting station of the Polar Bear Rug Company. A report has just reached us of the finding of a chubby old man with a long white beard, high boots, a red coat and a pack over his shoulder. He was found wandering ni mum- bling incoherently “T want electric trains with a lovely satin evening dress trimmed with two new tires for the car I have been a good boy and a diamond bracelet that talks, walks and sleeps sheer silk stockings papa says ate all my farina deserve hang up stock- ing a teddy bear that goes without winding because after suppet pants lik on Sundays with a dog collar for Rover and please bring mother a jackknife trimmed with Irish lace and a pipe that papa promised me if I was a good hangs near the chim- ney with a hole in the toe and sister don’t wear no stockings so I loaned two wheel bicycle with real puppy that barks at doll’s house with a coaster brake and chocolate cream and a rattle for the bab; boxing gloves like Gene Tunney told mamma I could have a baby brother and building blocks. . . . “Filled in fountain pen good boy with long whis and gla and whipped cream and marshmallow all around the top that spins for ten minutes with a baseball bearings roller skates on wrist watch with Under the hands and feet like Uncle Ned says plaster, etc., etc. always go to bed sister wants pair of long Bobby Jenkins to wear * “It's going to cost you a little more than usual this year—I'm touring the country under the management of ‘Cold-cash’ Pyle.” if I'm pussy cat that meows and I love my mother with chocolate icing and three tube radio set the Christ- mas tree in the parlor got no chimney but fire engines with real horses I want... .’ “We would appreciate anybody giving us some information about this queer old man who s he is anta Claus. Hah, h that’s a laugh for you. Oh, well, Miss Grace Yelp will now warble, ‘Come Hang Around the Arctie Circle With Me.’ Let ‘er go, Grace.” Hugh Wood A Modern Christmas Carol For the Wee Tots Wy HE spirit of Christmas cheer * meant almost nothing to poor in little Aloysius De Vantervale as he > sat musing in the great overstuffed — / armchair of his father's drawing-room — § and sipped sadly from his fourth 4 cocktail. gi Ah, it was all very well to go to 8 school and hear of the joy and peace. and good will which dwelt in men 63 hearts at this Yuletide s Aloysius had never gone to school. A but he felt that if he had he would have, if you grasp the essence. There would be no happiness in the Those Christmas Shopping Stockings not only create a holiday atmos- home of little Aloysius on this phere but help the overworked delivery man. (Continued on page 20) son. f < comicbooks.com