Judge — October 16, 1926 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE WIG. Some bright morning, Gentle Readers, you are going to stare at the newspaper over your coffee cup and read a screaming headline some- thing like this: YOUNG HARVARD STUDENT MURDERED IN HIS SLEEP BY JUDGE, JR.! . . . this bird Van Phelan, who got up the brilliant idea of a High Hat Club, has practically ruined my young life . . three extra postmen have been added to this route to take care of High Hat Club mail, and I’ve had to hire two extra secretaries to handle the correspondence . . . instead of ducking out of the office about three o'clock, as usual, I have to stay and write Eddie Zilch of Chillicothe and inform him that the High Hat Club is not a fact as yet, and that I can't pass on his application for membership because I haven’t any- thing to do with the darn thing anyway!... My public seems to think all they’ve got to do is send in a postal and they are members! yo mle ON According to these birds who have waxed enthusiastic over the club idea, the High Hat key would just about open anything in the city, and the possessor of it would be popular no end with the fair sex... Well, mebbe so, mebbe so... they’ve fallen for worse bunk than that!.... However, some of the suggestions have been interesting enough to have illustrated. and if the Club ever should see the light of day, or rather — evening. they actually might work .. . for example, the High Hat radiator cap, suggested by a Princeton lad wh self M.U.M.! .. . “Ma a very good job on it so don't judge by the illus- tration! ...We ready signs him- * didn't do are now for price quot. tions from radia- tor cap manu- facturers! 3 And why doesn’t some bright automobile manufacturer get out a High Hat Car, with a radiator shaped like a high hat! LK Some “DT from Cornell, (you might knewitwas from Cor- nell!) sug- gests that we arrange with the better **speak- easies” not to keep High Hat key holders waiting out in the cold Now idea! . . . there is a constructive He also goes on to suggest that Night Club proprietors might waive the cover charge for members. . . . Tl bet that lad believes in Santa Claus! . . . however, it probably, ’ could be fixed at that so that they'd get ringside tables and extra special attraction. The prize thought comes from Bill J. Jr. of Yale, no less, who says it would be great if hotels would cash checks for key holders. . .. Hot diggedy dog! It sure would, Bill!.... Tl speak to the Governor about it right away! Gerd comicbooks.com