Judge, 1926-08-28 · page 10 of 36
Judge — August 28, 1926 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page from *Judge* (a major American satirical magazine) satirizes early 20th-century employment advertisements through absurdist humor. The "Business Opportunities" section parodies classified ads by presenting ridiculous job postings with impossible or immoral requirements: a "General Handy Man" needing to be a bridge player and comedian; a chauffeur for a woman's European motor trip who must also serve as romantic chaperone; a "Good Mixer" seeking a man to secretly sample a wealthy employer's liquor; and "Shrieks"—testers needed to evaluate "kissproof rouge" by kissing. The cartoons below mock tabloid culture and leisure-class romance. One shows two tourists discussing sunburns; another depicts men reading newspapers with a caption about a "patent clamp" to prevent lip-moving while reading—mocking tabloid readers' animated expressions. The remaining poems and stories humorously chronicle romantic disappointments and physical ailments, reflecting period humor about courtship and social pretension typical of *Judge*'s satirical style.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
JUDGE Business Opportunities —But Opportunities! AL Hanpy Man—Neat ap- G pearance, pleasant personality, must play bridge and drive a car, swim, row a boat and know funny stories. Hours from 10 4 to 4 p.m., half day Saturday. Evening free. Highest references required. by letter only and enclose photo. Bumpydale Young Ladies’ Seminary, Hudson-on-the- Hudson, Hudson, N.Y. Cuaurreur—Attractive blonde hairess planning motor trip through Europe requires the services and un- divided attention of an unmarried man who can drive an Hispano-Suiza and act as chaperone and guide. Must be good dresser and know French. No reasonable offer re- jected. Write Bor OK16. Goop Mixer—A man who knows liquor and how to prepare drinks will find a splendid opportunity for ex- perimentation in the cellar of wealthy man too busy to personally attend to his own drinking. Inexperienced plasterers need not apply. Boot- leggers save your revenue stamps. Board and lodging free. Hospital attention when required. Salary no object if proper man is found. Phone Burgundy 1776 asked for Mr. Haig. Snemks—We require the services of several experienced and capabk of testers. Must know how to kiss and like his work. Come men in the capaci prepared to start right in. Lure D'Amour Kissproof Rouge Co., Petticoat Lane, Kansas City, Mo. Fotst Guy Seconp YEGG Fes Joshua commands the off it. —Yeh. . you look great, all sunburned—been away haint je? Wonderful view of the river from my window. sun to lay Not an anti-pyorrhea advertisement, but a patent clamp to prevent tabloid readers from moving their lips, designed by a member of the intelligentsia. Song to a Beechnut W's your shoulders are aching, your neck nearly breaking, And blisters all over your body Are suggesting you've been most un- usually in A tubful of steaming hot toddy. When your friends take to slapping you gayly, and clapping Their hands on your arms and your shoulders, When just going to bed seems to fill you with dread, For the mattresses boulders. all feel like When one leg’s so afire you've lost the desire To sit in a normal position, And your forehead’s so hot you would much rather not Expose your chapeau to ignition. When your skin’s feeling blazey and driving you crazy, And your friends only laugh as you screech; Just remember the day carelessly lay In the light of the sun of thebeach. Carroll Carroll that you Why He Didn’t Marry Her HE was worth a million, but he hated to marry for money. She w beautiful, he was afraid he'd be ious all his life. He didn’t like her mother. He didn’t want to live where she wanted to. He wanted to feel free. She didn’t sympathize with his love for golf. —And because she turned him down. ( comicbooks.com