Judge — August 21, 1926 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE A leader in the feminine movement. —Ya er Recorp Just Another Version A bashful suitor asked, “Betty, would you like to have a puppy? “Oh, Eddie,” she exclaimed. “How delightfully humble of you. Yes, dearest, I accept.” —Orange Ol tae Lord Chesterfield—Why did your wife return so soon from the United States? Lord Camel—They refused to re- fuse to admit her at Ellis Island. —Columbia Jester “My husband is an auful liar.” “Oh, I don’t know. I think he’s pretty good at it.” —C. C. N. Y. Mercury “What's showing here to-night?” “Romeo and Juliet.’ ” “Yeh, I know, but what are they playing in?” —Oklahoma Whirlwind . “Who was that flounder I saw you with last night?” “That was no flounder, that was my sole mate.” —CotumBta JESTER Marriage Song Oh, there’s pain in my breast; In my heart there’s a sigh. Though I struggle my best, There’s a pain in my breast. It's so hard to digest, My Julia’s first pie; So there’s pain in my breast; In my heart there’s a sigh. —Toronto Goblin PAS He—Gosh, we're out of gas. She—Don't be silly. Some one is liable to see us here. —West Point Pointer SID Passenger—Can’t you go any faster than this? Connie—If you don’t like it, ya can get off and walk. “Oh, my no, I’m not in such a hurry as all that.” —Pitt Panther Provident Nature N the beginning, When the world was a Paradise, And Adam and Eve owned every- thing, Mother Nature said: “T have given these two people Everything that can be imagined. What is there left For the rest of humanity, That these two have not? So after searching far and wide, Mother Nature found something, That Adam and Eve had not, But that all the world has to-day. Ladies and gents, Meet the mother-in-law joke. —C.0.N.Y. Mercury Canal He (trying to locate his month's Let's see, I had fifteen— spent $5 on likker, lost $5 in a poker game, and—er—I must have spent the other $5 foolishly. —Tehigh Burr “Look at that pallbearer. His knees are giving way.” “Yes, he never could hold his bier.” —M. I. T. Voo Doo comicbooks.com