Judge — July 31, 1926 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE The auto that got away from the hitching-post and came home. Hydrophobia The Dog Catcher's Daughter Orxce there w ik d a lady with a face like a s St. Bernard dog. Her father was a dog catcher. No one wanted to wed her; nobody loved her; nobody bothered to look at her. Nobody knew she was alive. But her father was a great dog catcher. He had caught more dogs than any dog catcher had ever caught before in the history of dog catching. It drove him wild to think that he, the greatest dog catcher in the world, could not use his prestige nor his skill in dog catching to catch a good husband for his daughter. And the wilder he grew, the wilder the dogs he caught, and the wildest of these wilder dogs he kept for himself and his daughter —with a purpose. This was his pur- pose—or rather, this was his plan as he subsequently put it into execution: When he had made a million dollars by dog catching, the talented catcher moved with his dogs and his daughter to the West, where he built them a castle approached through a wood by a mile-long path. And_ across this path he erected four great gates, Before the first gate he stationed two savage setters as tall as horses, and before the second gate he placed four violent bulldogs as big as bulls; and before the third gate he placed six Belgian police dogs, terrible as tigers, and before the fourth gate, an octette of wolfhounds wilder than any wolves you have ever seen or heard of. And immediately around the castle, hounds and terriers, setters s of all kinds and degrees h sharpened fangs and empty bellies, stood guard over the lady within, the pearl—not quite —bey “Ha-ha!” said the dog catcher, husband catcher, when the layout had been completed. “This will fetch ’em. Not a man worth his salt can resist this tempting challenge. What an admirable mode of catching . Gr "aN eel dl $f =) my daughter the worthiest of hus- bands!” Then he hung up a sign at the entrance to the wood: LADY WITHIN— BEWARE THE DOG! nd. Not a man worth his salt could resist. the challenge of the dog catcher’s wild dogs. Hardly one who took the challenge but came back with a dazzling surmise of the in- visible lady’s beauty. The first to give battle to the savage setters tall as horses, came running away without the seat of his trousers. And it was as he predic “Her dogs are demons,” he re- ported once he had regained his breath: ‘So fierce, they must guard a treasure of incalculable value!” The hundred and first’ knight— who slew the setters and slipped past the first gate to do battle with the bulldogs—returned minus a_ sight more than the seat of his pantaloons. “They are devils out of hell,” he reported, “placed there to guard an angel of surpassing loveliness!” “She is too beautiful to behold,” regretfully announced the thousandth warrior, who pole-axed the bulldogs only to meet his Waterloo with the belligerent Belgiar ‘These savage 1 are guarding us—if we had the wit to know it—from a loveliness too fatally seductive for the vision of mortal man!” wk Bic Hone Y/ “My uncle left me out of his will, curse it!” “Well, why can’t you contest it, Reuben?” “T can't, not until he’s dead.” comicbooks.com