Judge, 1926-07-24 · page 8 of 36
Judge — July 24, 1926 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains satirical humor typical of early 20th-century American magazines. The "Judge's Question Box" feature deliberately gives absurd, nonsensical answers to ordinary advice questions—mixing radio terminology into a cooking problem, confusing weddings with funerals. The joke mocks both advice columnists and readers seeking guidance. The poem "When the Worm's Turn Comes" expresses working-class frustration with economic constraints. The speaker fantasizes about confronting their boss defiantly, but cannot act because of pressing financial obligations: children's shoes, mortgage payments, car repairs, household needs. The "worm" metaphor suggests submission and powerlessness. The satire critiques how financial desperation keeps workers trapped in exploitative situations, unable to assert dignity or independence—a commentary on early-20th-century labor conditions and economic precarity. The cartoon captions provide additional gentle humor about everyday life and consumer desires.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Momma—Poor poppa can’t be here! Judge’s Question Box EAR JupGE: I am a young girl of, say thirty-six summers, have gone to bed early all my life, walked home from parties and all that sort of thing. I don’t mind my unpopu- larity so much as I like myself alone with me, but recently I’ve been bothered a lot with wrinkles in my mashed potatoes. Can you suggest anything? Troubled Dear Trub: We could suggest a lot of things but not in this here column. It seems to me that the potential oscillation of your one-way transmitter is not rapid enough for the 400 meter single circuit regenera- tive receiver which you are using. On the other hand, your antennae and tuning coil may be too highly insulated. If the chills continue fill them with boiling water and a pinch of gum drops. If the static is right, you ought to get better results at shorter distances. Dear Mr. Jupce: My mother and J are planning a wedding for this fall —just a simple, informal little thing in the back parlor, with a few tables of solitaire. I am puzzled, however, as to whether the groom’s flower girls shall wear gardenias in their hair or Cornwall on the Hudson. Also, what will take tooth marks out of an old apple? Kathleen Dearest Lena: If it is an afternoon funeral, yes. If in the evening, my yes. R.S.W. “You're looking well to-day Mr. Tinkey.” “Well, I’m not.” Sa lice | ite “T want to buy a petticoat.” When the Worm’s Turn Comes Soe bright day, some right day, some morning resplendent, With courage ascendant and syl- lables gruff, I'll say to the boss with a voice inde- pendent, “You selfish slave-driver, I’m calling your bluff!” But just at the moment the baby needs shoes, The boys in the office hold my 1.0. U.s, Our set needs new batteries—the sig- nals are faint; The old family chateau needs awn- ings and paint. The mortgage comes due and they must not foreclose, I'm badly in need of some new sum- mer clothes. The Ford could use tires, the windows need screens, And I've got about eighteen bucks in my jeans. I suffer in silence, a worm in a rut, A cog in the wheel and a rubber- stamp, but Some gay day, some pay day, I'll pour out the torrent Of evils abhorrent more bitter than brine, Some day things in the future when other warrant, I'll baw! out the boss and I'll proudly resign! Arthur L. Lippmann FLoorwaLker—Next department in the antiques. comicbooks.com