Judge — May 22, 1926 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Burglar (to clumsy pal)—That’s the idea, Bill—deafen ‘em, so they can't hear us! Popular Recreations Conferences {oun or five years ago (the game of conferences is practically a new one) when business men ceased tend- ing to business and started sitting in private offices and ringing bells for what they wanted, the inactivity of the confined life began to pall on them. It got so they just couldn't bear it. They weren’t pallbearers. For this reason they sought rect tion in filing systems, dial telephones and conferences. In conferences, especially, they found an outlet for their exuberant spirits and an inlet for their contra- band spirits, as well as the means for bringing them into direct contact with other little big-business men who were also languishing for some companions with whom to play. All that is needed to play confer- ence is aJarge room with a lone table, plenty of pencils and pads and any number of men above two, either in age or number. However, when only two play it is calledja confab. ‘This name derives from the fact that the conversation is mostly fabri- cations. The object of a confab is to make the other fellow pay. A regulation size conference is played in a conference-room, as stated above. When playing on your home grounds you have to fur- nish the cigars, cigarettes and perish- able liquids. As the visiting con- testants enter, the home conferee greets them at the door calling them sid socks,” “brother Apfelbaum,” »ig butter and egg men,” “friend O'Brien” and other similarly quaint names. This is called good-fellow- nd counts 35 points. —Humorist home player doesn’t one of the visitors he says, ll, well, well! I certainly didn’t expect to see you here! This im- makes them both Elks and nference is ready to begin. This is done as follows: Somebody takes out his watch and says, “Tze, tze! Come, come, come! Let's get down to brass tacks.” Brass tacks are then distributed and he contin- ue: Now in regard to this matter of putting paper drinking cups in. the assistant bookkeeper’s office, I think that in view of the fact that he is not adrinking man a8 At this point some one must inter- rupt with, “That reminds me of the day I got tight after breaking a hun- dred and making a hole in one all in one day, which puts me in mind of a little story. It seems there were two t and Mike * This is a signal for general bedlam. Bedlam reigns for a while and finally the conference is called on account of rain. A return conference is then Irishmen arranged at one of the other con- feree’s home grounds and everyone does a mile around the track, takes a brisk shower and rub-down and goes into training for the next con- lies that night to get some new jokes. This is practically useless, but traditional. Carroll ference by going to the tot Poct—To dance with you is to fly. With your wings we ean reach the stars! Modern Giri—How about vol- planing down to the bar? Le Régiment (Paris) Card Playing Enthusiast (in long traffic jam)—What about a game of bridge? —London Opinion comicbooks.com