Judge, 1925-12-05 · page 11 of 36
Judge — December 5, 1925 — page 11: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "Uncle Si's Incompetent Hired Hand" This rural humor story satirizes the clash between farm life and modern technology. Uncle Si, a farmer, must fire his hired hand despite the young man's musical talent (saxophone playing) because he's incompetent with machinery: he drives the tractor too slowly, grinds the gears carelessly, operates the electric ice plant poorly, and damaged the radio antenna. The satire's punchline reveals the real problem: the hired hand, having visited New York City, now has "high falutin' city idees" and wants Uncle Si to buy horses and ducks—essentially rejecting modern farm equipment for old-fashioned methods. The joke mocks both the hired hand's pretentious adoption of rural nostalgia and, implicitly, rural resistance to progress. It's a snapshot of 1920s-era tension between agricultural and urban American values.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ee Uncle Si’s Incompetent Hired Hand Freou the way Uncle Si toyed with the first nine courses of the simple evening meal, his good wife knew he was puzzled. “Tell me what's th’ trouble, Si,” she queried, anxiously. “Ain't things just right on th’ old farm?” Uncle Si sighed heavily. “Ma,” he began, slowly, “I’m goin’ t’ have t’ let th’ new hired hand go, I reckon.” “Oh, no, Si!” protested Ma. “He plays th’ sax’phone so nice!” “Wal, thet’s right,” admitted Uncle Si. “But otherwise he ain’t much ‘count on a farm. He's afraid t’ give th’ big tractor th’ gas on th’ turns 'n it'll take him two days, anyhow, t’ get th’ south forty acres ready at th’ rate he drives.” “Thet aint so bad, mebbe, but then ’t seems ’s if he c’n never take th’ see-dan out an’ shift from second t’ third without buzzin’ th’ gears, ’n he allus signals a left turn for a right. He don’t understand th’ first thing about operatin’ th’ electric ice plant ’r ventilation system ’n Picture of a he-man wondering if there are any more she-women. Jupce Nominates for the Hall of Fame ECAUSE he was the world’s oldest pedestrian; because he did not attribute his longevity record to a life of abstinence; because he is not responsible for the phrase: “The first hundred years are the hardest”; but most of all because he refrained from bragging of the fact that he had known the time when a man could get a good cigar for five cents. [Zesayene Rae beasticrese | when the cyclone blowed th’ ecerial down last week he didn’t even know th’ lead-in wire from th’ entenny.” “TI c'd fergive his mechan’cal ig- n’r’nce, ma, but he’s chicken-hearted t’ boot. This mornin’, when th’ dairy truck from town broke down, I suggested Zeb Hoskins was goin’ to fly his plane t’ town ’n th’ boy ¢’d ride in with Zeb ’n bring back th’ cream in a taxi, but he turned pale as a sheet ’n complained he had a fierce headache.” “Even if all them things is true, Si,” pleaded Ma. “Couldn't we give th’ boy just one more chance?” Uncle Si was silent for a minute. Then he burst out: “I wasn't goin t’ tell th’ worst, but you're forcin’ me to. This hired hand was t’ th’ city last month ’n 't ruined him. He went out t’ Central Park one day ’n ev’ry since he’s been filled with high falutin’ city idees. You can’t guess what he’s been pesterin’ me t’ do!” “Tell me, Si!” “Wal, ma, he wants me t’ buy a horse ’r two an’ some ducks!” Chet Johnson comicbooks:com