Judge — November 28, 1925 — page 22: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

ODD OCCURRENCES Sailors weighing anchor at sunrise. —Cairornia PELIcaN Rime of an Ancient Moron-er It was an ancient moron-er And he grabbed hold of me, “By thy long cars and glittering nose How come you get that way?” “Just listen, my lad, and you will meer At that midnite spree of Paul Revere, By the old Moulmein Pagoda, look- ing eastward to the sea, There’s a Burma girl a’sitting and I know she thinks of me.” “The time has come,” I then replied, “To think of lots of things, Of cigarettes and chewing gum And Fords and wedding rings.” And as he rose the mighty crowd Set up a yell forlorn, A sadder and'a wiser man I rose the morrow morn. —S, California Wampus PID Rollo—Latest reports say that lip- stick is now being flavored with fruit Wallo—Oh, now I understand what Jim meant when he said Alice gave him the raspberry the other night! —Washington Dirge al “None of your lip,” said the cold- hearted woman to her over-affec- tionate escort. —Cornell Widow Ole Shuteye Ed—Why the grip? Co-ed—Oh, that’s my knapsack. “Knapsack?” “Yes, pyjamas and things.” —Washington Dirge Facerious Warter—Yes, sir. How would you like some Pété of Pithecanthropus Gras or some choice Brontosaurus giblets? —Ya.e Recoxp Clara—Did you hear about Maude turning down that big job? Anne—No. What was that? “She was offered a top-salaried position as woman detective, but she refused to be known as a plain- clothes woman, —Iowa Fritol PID Our nomination for the Hall of America’s Dumb is the guy who stopped for half an hour at the rail- road crossing, waiting for the stop- sign to change. —Washington Dirge IID Ho—Why does Professor Dobbs look so down in the mouth? Hum—Poor fellow, he had an un- fortunate love affair. “Unfortunate love affair?” “Yeah—got married.” —Alabama Rammer Jammer PID Binks (phoning down from his room)—Night clerk? Snippy Clerk—Well, what’s biting you? “That's what I want to know.” —YFale Record An earnest young man trying to get ahead. —Wisconsiy Octrorcs comicbooks.com