Judge — November 21, 1925 — page 34: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

She—Why are you always playing golf? He—It keeps me fit. “Fit—but for what?” “More golf.” Strictly Honest “TI told him he was a brute, and returned all his beastly presents.” “And what did the wretch do?” “Sent me a dozen boxes of face powder in return for what he had taken home on his coat!” —Sydney Bulletin as Sir J. C. Percy tells the following: An inquisitive man in a train asked a fellow passenger what was in his basket. “A ferret,” the stranger replied. “What are you going to do with it?” asked the inquisitive man, “My brother has got D. T.’s,” said the stranger, “‘and sces pink rats.” “But they are not real rats,” argued the inquisitive man. “And this is not a real ferret,” said the. stranger. —Tattler The Novice The charge was drunkenness and the accused hung his head. “You needn't be so ashamed of yourself,” said the kind-hearted magistrate. “It’s the first time.” “Yes, said the accused, “that’s the reason.” —Smith's Weekly Pas “Is your husband fond of home cooking?” “Oh, yes, we always dine at a restaurant that makes a specialty of i —Passing Show PID The train came to a sudden stop between stations with a tremendous grinding of brakes. Immediately a worried-looking man rushed down the track and demanded the reason of the guard, “What is it?” he asked. “An accident?” “Somebody pulled the communica- tion cord,” was the reply. “The driver put on the brakes too quickly and one of the cars went off the rails. We'll be held up about four hours.” “Four hours!” exclaimed the pas- senger. “But I’m to be married to-day!” Instantly the guard turned on him. “Say,” he demanded, “you ain’t the fellow who pulled the cord, are you?” —Tit Bits PID A—How would you classify a tele- phone girl? Is hers a business or a profession? B—Neither. It’s a calling. —The Continent “This is the way back all right, George. There’s the man we ran over this morning.” —Gaiety comicbooks.com