Judge — November 21, 1925 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Christmas Seals Stamp Out Tuberculosis The National, State and Local Tuberculosis Associations of the United States TRAVEL COMFORT The nausea of Sea, Train and | Car Sickness promptly relieved. Experienced travelers all testify to its positive action. 25 years in USE. 45. $1.50.at Drug Sees dis receipt of Price rhe meters ‘Ready CaM. Y. City better for sl appetite than SamtBio by Weal 25-ctx * Co., Baltimore, Md. She (discussing cost of livingX—I'm sorry for anyone who gets married these days. The Brute—Why these days? Auctions Speak Louder Than Words (Continued from page 6) Two or maybe three hours later Tobias set forth. In his left trouser pocket were three crisp, crackling hundred dollar _ bills. Tightly clenched in his hand was Mr. Flubb’s copy for the new wall motto: “A Mission Faithfully Fulfilled Makes the Angels Sing.” In his heart was joy. In his head rang the prosy sentiments of Mr. Flubb’s series of inspiring wall mottoes. In his path was the red-flagged establishment of Ulysses U. Unger, auctioneer, and Lady Luck, so far as Tobias was concerned, had retired for the day. eee eee “Lad-ees and gents, to sell this Venetian vase, lovingly made by the craftsmen of Italy for a mere $3, is an insult to those Latin-blooded artists whose souls were poured into their work!” bellowed the blustering auctioneer Unger to an audience of twelve apathetic spectators, made up of one Western Union messenger boy, five salesmen waiting for the movies to open, three stenographers killing half of their lunch hour and three jovial gentlemen in the final stage of acute alcoholism. The alcoholic trinity yelled, “Hooray” and were forcibly ejected. Unger’s silvery sentences, floating through the open door, tinkled in Tobias’ ears. Unger was picturing the romance of hat-rack making in Bavaria. Tobias paused. Tobias wrestled with himself. Himself got the decision. Tobias sauntered in and stood right below Unger. “Only —Gaiety for a moment,” whispered the Tabbs conscience to itself,“‘an infinitesimal, atomic moment.” “And I could never look my chil- dren in the face again if I let this gen-you-wine Clois-on-nay vase go for $30!" shouted the auctioneer, wiping the tears from his cheeks and making a strong effort to regain self- control. ‘Who'll give me thirty- five?” Suddenly Tobias felt a sharp pain in his right eye. He blinked once or twice to relieve the hurt— “Sold to the gentlemen here!” shouted auctioneer Unger, pointing to Tobias. “Young man, I con- gratulate you on your possession of & gen-you-wine Clois-on-nay vase of the Ming dynasty.” “But,” feebly protested Tobias— “That's all right,” shouted Unger, “I know you're sorry the other bid- ders couldn't get it, but that’s their own fault. Let ’em pay the price for their indecision.” Before Tobias could protest further, the auctioneer produced a lacquered Chinese cabinet. ‘In this cabinet, ladies and gentlemen,” he shouted, “The baby emperors of China kept their playthings. Our secret agents in Pekin, at great risk and personal danger, secured this for us by invading the sacred Temple of Phloofem, not far from Shang So Hi. You all know that the finest lacquered cabinets come from Shang So Hi, don’t you?” “Abs’lutely,” hiccoughed one of the alcoholic trio, who had managed to sneak in again. “Ten—twenty—forty dollars! I thank you,” bellowed ~~ Unger. “Who'll give fifty? Going, going—" comicbooks.com