Judge — October 24, 1925 — page 25: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Goliath’s Alibi cot framed on, double-crossed, see? No li’l runty high school kid ever licked me an’ ever will. Just before I goes into the ring wit’ this shrimp David I gets a tip there’s fifty bucks init if I lay offa him until the second roun’, see? J’m a square guy. I says sure I'll let him live the firs’ roun’, But I sees somethin’s wrong right away. I'm supposed to fight wit’ a fifty- poun’ club an’ him wit’ t’ree-ounce pebbles, see? Them li’l rocks don’t even tickle me. I keep outa his way the firs’ roun’. An’ what happens? I walks out the nex’ roun’ to smear him all over the ring, but he don’t fight fair, see? His secon’s sneaks in a pile o’ rocks as big as ostrich eggs. Before I can get wise he loads his slingshot wit’ a five-poun’ hunka granite an’ smacks me in the nose. Thollers but the referee’s in wit’ em an’ don’t do nothin’, see? Wot happens nex’? This Davey kid uppercuts seven-poun’s o’ sharp rock to me chin an’ follers wit’ a ten-poun’ brick to me kidneys, see? I knows I’m framed to lose so when he flips a twelve-poun’ slab to me right lamp I figgers it ain’t no use tryin’ to fight a flyin’ quarry in aframe-up bout, so I jus’ slips down an’ lets em count me out. But if I | getta return match wit’ this li'l | Percy-boy David I’ll knock him so far it'll take his secon’s a montha Yom Kippurs to find out where he landed, see? Chet Johnson The Major—Yes, sir, I am a man of few words. The Other—I understand perfectly; Tm married myself. —London Mail SAY “BAYER ASPIRIN” and INSIST! Proved safe by millions and prescribed by physicians for Headache Neuralgia Pain Toothache Safe Colds Neuritis Lumbago Rheumatism Accept only “Bayer” package which contains proven directions. Handy “Bayer” boxes of 12 tablets Also bottles of 24 and 100—Druggists. Aspirin is the trade mark of Bayer Manufacture of Monoaceticacidester of Salicylicacid It may bea little bit NAUGHTY | but then, we ask you, | how else could we get out a PARISIENNE NUMBER of UDGE ? e November 5, on all NEWSSTANDS “I FORGET—” One of the greatest attributes to success in busi- ness is a ready, reliable memory, not a memory which is cluttered-up with unnecessary details, but a memory that is trained to retain and recall the pertinent transactions of the business day. To be unable to recall important circumstances, to be forced to the admission, “I forget,” brands one as incapable and unreliable. No longer need the ambitious man or woman have an unreliable memory, for a simple, prac- tical and effective method of memory training is now available. POWER and FORCE William Clarke Late of the Royal Polytechnic Institute, London, England a Presents in easily understood English the secret | of the master key to memory, with special chapters on “Memory in’ Business,"” “Remembering Names and Faces and “Memory Defects Remedied” as well as many other interesting and enlightening facts. Bound in 16 handy pocket sized’ booklets, pro- fusely illustrated, our present limited edition will be sold at the remarkably low price of $1.00 per set JUDGE BOOK DEPARTMENT 627 West 43d Street New York