Judge, 1925-07-25 · page 4 of 36
Judge — July 25, 1925 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Content Analysis **Top Cartoon ("Thrilled Spinster"):** A comedic scene where a large man in a coat rushes toward a woman, crushing her to his chest while kissing her. A policeman observes. The caption plays on mistaken identity—she assumes he's a policeman but he's actually a "keeper" (suggesting an asylum worker or caretaker). The joke relies on slapstick humor and the woman's romantic misinterpretation. **"The Night Before Christmas" Poem:** A humorous parody of the classic Christmas poem, but set in summer (July), with winter imagery reversed. References to boiling heat, kids unable to sleep, and the absurdity of writing Christmas carols "At ninety degrees in the shade" satirize the heat of summer publication deadlines. **Bottom Illustration:** Shows fashionable women and a man, with a caption about styles finally achieving "common sense principles"—likely mocking women's fashion trends of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Turitiep Sprnster—He just rushed right up to me, crushed me to his bosom, and Irissed me passionately. It’s lucky you came up, Mr. Policeman. “Yeah, on’y I ain’t a policeman, I’m ’is keeper.” The Night Before Christmas Ts the night before Christmas and all through the house heat suffocated each insect and mouse. The mercury stood at the top boiling point; (There wasn’t a breeze to be found in the joint.) The snowflakes descended; the gale mounted higher; (But all we could do was perspire.) The ice-covered branches bejeweled all the trees— (We slept on the roof in search of a breeze) The snowdrifts had covered the countryside deep; My bedroom was sizzling; (the kids couldn’t sleep) The stars looked at me from a chill winter sky (While the kids skated round in July.) Our neighbors in earmuffs and furs were attired— (We sizzled and roasted; we boiled and perspired) ’Twas the night before Christmas (the one in July) And believe me it’s tough on a verse- writing guy To write Christmas carols, with zest undismayed, At ninety degrees in the shade! From broken-down arches * John Pullivan croaked. He walked a good mile For each Camel he smoked. ened tinue tle botany slo $5 for each ome nila at at, ile Ge Print nt Bo. <ZNSS Let X-Mas Equal the *y I Known Quantity (Standard Yuletide Formula No. 324-B) NE thermometer in front of . . , store registered . . . degrees be- low zero, as . . . hard-hearted vil- lage skinflint knocked at the door of the widow . . . humble cottage, “Pay this . . . mortgage,” he said, “or I'll turn you out into the...” “Have . . . sir,” wailed the widow, “and do you not know it is Christmas . . . in other words the +.» before Christmas—?” “And. . .through the. . . not a «+. Was stirring,” answered the widow’s sick... aged eighteen months who was coughing. Tears came to the cheeks of the + +. as he tore up the mortgage and said, “God... you, widow ... and may your baby ... and you have a Merry... and a Happy » Still Greater Settler—-In the city I miss the great solitudes. Marken—Stop at a hotel and don’t tip! GIS What the modern workingman demands is a fliving wage. “Thank heaven the styles have at last got down to common sense principles.” comicbooks.com ©