Judge — April 18, 1925 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Absorbing Adventures of Professor Blotter Proresson Buorter, who will be remembered for his invention of a lumpless potato to be used in restaurants, was elected a member of the Restaurant Chefs’ Association by the grateful cooks. He is at present engaged in breeding a rubber grape- fruit that will not squirt when it is squeezed, Blotters first move after his clee- tion was to perfect the Blotter hand pump for blowing up cream puffs. This device consists of a cream pump filled with air, a jack, a lug wrench, and a complete vulcanizing kit in case the puff gets punctured in the process. Another famous invention of the busy professor's is the Blotter re- movable pie flaps. ‘These handy flaps button very quickly onto the upper and lower crusts of a slice of huckleberry pie, and prevent the contents from spilling out the sides onto the tablecloth or necktie when- ever the victim takes a bite. The in- vention was first suggested to the professor by Percy Crosby, a well- known restaurant chef, and Blotter readily absorbed the idea. In addition to his restaurant activi- ties, the professor has devoted no little time to the problems of ban- quet photographs. He hopes even- tually to invent an invisible flash- light powder that will go off without any noise, and not come back until the picture is taken. Why not filling stations for babies? Blotter found, after some research, that in every banquet photograph there is always a little fellow in the lower left-hand corner whose head slopes at an angle of forty-five degrees to the right, and another little fellow in the lower right-hand corner whose head slopes at an angle of forty-five degrees to the left. “My remedy is simple,” said Blotter. “I shall set out at once to find two lop-sided men whose heads slope respectively forty-five degrees to the left and forty-five degrees to the right. I shall then seat them respectively in the lower right and lower left-hand corners of the picture. Consequently, their heads will come out straight, improving their heads as well as the picture. “Nothing to it.” he added. “Precisely * T agreed. Corey Ford KRALY KRACKS “give a sentence with the w Nonsense “To ain't seen her nonsense she gare me the gate.” je paye $5 for each krazy krack printed. In Litigation Old Gentleman—And_ whose little girl are you? Modern Child—That's up to the judge, sir. Mother and father are fighting it out in court! Problems Charles — Women are puzzles, aren't they Thomas—Yes, V've had to give several of them up. sae “There's one thing I don't like about this house,” said Mrs. Peck. “and that's my husband!” comicbooks.com