Judge — November 22, 1924 — page 20: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Let Us Be Kinder to Traffic Cops by Don Herold I HAVE made up my wind to try to be more pleasant and gentle in my relations with traffic cops. It is true that many of them are very, very provoking, and, after one has been plagued by the misconduct of cop after cop, it requires the utmost restraint not to say something to them that will hurt them to the quick. Just yesterday I literally lashed a traffic officer with my ready tongue. I was crossing a street intersection with my car, and he started to rebuke me for doing so while he had the stop signal turned toward me. I com- pletely lost my manners. “You big bum,” I said, putting all refinement side for the moment, “can’t you see that I am in a hurry!’ Why don’t you get some signs that a person can read ten feet away? I am a little near-sighted, anyway. How did I know that you meant for me to stop when you held up the palm of your hand at me? You cops are a menace to public safety. It is cops like you who cause all the accidents—trying to get gentlemen like me to stop so suddenly. You think you can put something over on me, do you! What if every cop in town pulled that stuff! I have a big notion to have you ar- rested. Don’t let it happen again.” He apologized meekly and ab- jectly. T could see that he was com- pletely crestfallen and deeply hurt. He probably felt depressed all day and made a number of similar mis- takes, just out of nervousness. As I drove on, I thought over what I had done, and my conscience hurt me considerably. The poor fellow had probably been trying to do his duty as best he could, yet I had prac- tically snapped his head off. I re- flected that he was just as human as I, and that no doubt he had a wife and child at home, and perhaps even an aged mother of whom he was the whole support with the possible ex- ception of her meager pension from the Government (since she was per- haps the widow of a veteran of the (Continued on page 30) “Oh, darling, quick; there’s a tree! Honk your horn!” Woman Is Like A book—usually bound to please. A train—often gets on the wrong track. A magazine—lots of fiction be- neath the cover. A program—subject to change without notice. An automobile—often runs people down. A lamp—apt to flare up and get turned down. A banjo—often picked on by her friends. A thermometer—often of very high degre A at times. A church—men make sacrifices for her. A stove—often needs a new lid. But the average man admits that there is nothing like her! inclined to be puffed up Fifty-fifty The real woman loves a man for himself alone. The real man loves a woman for himself alone. Fae “Here is where I am borne to blush unseen,” thought the dollar bill in a girl's stocking. Willing Targets Kriss—All women aim at matri- mony. Kross—You bet! And all the men are easy marks! 1s comicbooks.com