Judge — August 23, 1924 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Opening Night by George Mitchell Seventy Movie Stars in Person— Count "Em! Te motion picture reviewer of this mirthful and merry magazine is in no physical con- dition to write a page of copy this week. He is prone. He is non-plus- ultraed. He is badly damaged about the torso, trunk and limbs, upper and lower. To wit, or to half-wit: Four dislocated elbows; seven black eyes; three flat tires... . But to tell you why, if, when and what happened to him. You see it was after this fashion. He, in the heroic discharge of his duty, gaily sallied forth to the opening night of “Love and Glory.” That was of a Monday night. In the crush and log jam of humanity (?) that cluttered the sidewalks of New York adjutant to the Lyric Theater, he lost one right leg, one left arm, two left ears and his presence of mind. . . Of a Tuesday morning, bright and early, thirteen sturgeons, with gimlet, scalpel and adz, made the necessary repairs to his anatomy and put him on his feet and mettle for the opening, Tues- day night, of Marion Davies in “Jaundice Meredith.” Again and ever more heroically he gaily sallied forth—or fifth, this time. History repeated itself (Jaun- dice Meredith is an_ historical picture). The crowd at the curb side met him full on. (Continued on page 3.2) | © se-—__ W Noonday crowds in the busiest section of a Dame Carp—Mercy! Flossie Flapper’s got her tail bobbed! ‘Tet Your FRIENDS “To Buy OLD Doe 'ToBACIO Youu UKE iF \ NY » bustling Scotch city on a National Tag Day What's in a Name? Assistant—The Irish stew has burned. Chef—Well, put some spice in it and add “A la Francaise” to its name on the menu. Safety First Mrs. Swift—She doesn’t believe in hiding her light under a bushel. Mrs. Swifter—Indeed __ not! But she manages to keep her old flames under cover! A Position Judge—What do you do during the week? Witness—Nothing. “And on Sunday?” “TI take a day off.” “Oh, I see. What salary does the city pay you?” Natural Outcome After a man graduates from col- lege, he has an idea that he will move heaven and earth—but he usually ends up by rocking a cradle,