Judge — August 9, 1924 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE BUSINESS OF PLAY REVIEWING by George Jean Nathan NBELIEVABLE as it may seem, l there are people who actually envy me my job as-a play re- viewer. Hardly a week passes that I don’t get at least three or four letters which, after handing me a little soft soap by way of coaxing a reply out of me, inquire how their writers can best go about the business of becoming dramatic critics. It appears to be the universal idea that being a dramatic critic is very hot stuff. From a perusal of the ‘letters that come to me I con- clude that the average layman believes that the life of a dramatic critic follows something like this schedule: 12 noon.—The critic arises, bathes, dresses, and breakfasts. 1 p.m. to 2 p.m.—Spends reading love letters from Ethel Barrymore, Jeanne Eagles, Marilynn Miller, Lenore Ulric, Doris Keane, Pauline Lord, Marjorie Rambeau, Pauline Frederick, Florence Reed and Laurette Taylor. 2 p.m. to 2.30 p.m.—Spends reading loving telegrams from Marie Doro, Julia Sanderson, Fay Bainter, Madge ik il | | [ i i \ iy “What's the idea of the barber’s chairs?” “We're going to have asparagus for dinner.” li Kennedy, Nance O'Neil, Dorothy Stone, Peggy Joyce, Bertha Kalich and Florence Mills. . 230 p.m. to 38.15 p.m.—Luinches either with Mrs. Fiske or June Walker, at the lady’s expense. 3.16 p.m.—Is presented with a hand- some gold cigarette case by his hinch- eon companion. 3.30 p.m. to 4 p.m.—Drives through the park with Frances Starr, Mary Nash, Mary Eaton, Constance Binney, Irene Bordoni or Carroll MacComas, puffing luxuriously at a $1.65 cigar given him by Al Woods. 4.15 p.m. to 5 p.m.—Spends reading invitations to dinner and supper from Laura Hope Crews, Blanche Bates, Jane Cowl, Ruth Chatterton, Helen Menken, Lynn Fontanne, Helen Ga- hagan, Ann Pennington, Florence Moore and Eleanor Painter. 5 pm to 5.30 p.m.—Has tea with Odette Myrtil, Emily Stevens, Ger- trude Lawrence, Helen Hayes, Beatrice Lillie or Katharine Cornell. (Continued on page 27) SZ Za XXX! Henry slipped and broke his neck. His tombstone now says: R. I. P. But what we’re mourning for, by heck, is the bottle on his H. I. P.! FAH Why don’t they put the scenery in the automobiles—then we could sit on our piazzas and watch it go by! A Just Reason Kniclk—What'’s the reason Short doesn’t speak to his tailor? —, Knack—He sold him a suit that wore out while he was promising to pay for it! HIS The population of this country is now 112,826,000. That doesn’t include, however, the man who believes in prohibition. Fair Warning Parson White—Does you take this man fo’ better or fo’ worse? Liza—If he’s no better den de las’ one, it'll be de worse fo’ him. comicbooks.com