Judge, 1924-05-31 · page 12 of 36
Judge — May 31, 1924 — page 12: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# "Angela; or, the Poisoned Nasturtiums" This is a humorous domestic story about a husband and wife dealing with garden pests. Angela discovers bugs on their nasturtium plants and pressures her husband to eliminate them. He suggests absurd solutions (planting new rows, using wooden blocks to crush individual bugs), which she dismisses. When they consult a catalog, they settle on "Paris green"—a real arsenic-based pesticide widely used in the early 20th century. The husband applies it to eliminate the bugs successfully. The joke's punchline: he admits he sprinkled the poison on *all* their garden vegetables (tomatoes, lettuce, rhubarb, parsnips), making them inedible. Angela's response is darkly pragmatic—they'll simply buy vegetables from the grocer instead. The accompanying cartoon shows a woman dramatically gesturing while a man flees, illustrating marital chaos. The footer moralizes that "Miss Nature Lover will not kill any of God's creatures as a sacrifice to fashion"—likely mocking contemporary environmental or animal-welfare concerns.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
“By the way, Millie—” “Please don't disturb me, mother—I'm thinking.” Angela: or, the Poisoned Nasturtiums I NEVER know how to put these things. I should like to say that the nastur- tiums were, well, infected, and let it go at that, Angela broke the news to me by saying they were simply corered, and I must put something on them. 1 didn’t understand why I should put anything else on’them if they were covered already, and I told her so. myself. T was brutal about it when I returned. “They've bugs!” [ announced. “Armies of bugs!” she amplified ex- citedly. “All black, and running up and down the stems. You've got to do some- thing.” “Do you suppose that a severe letter to the paper—” “How are you going to get them?” she interrupted. “Oh, there are a . great many ways,” I weepingly “For instance, I might plant a new row of nasturtiums next to these—" “And then—?" “Wait patiently until the bugs have crawled over to the new row of nastur- tiums, and then dig them all up again.” I nodded pleasantly. “Or else I might use two blocks of wood.” “What would you do with two blocks of wood?” “A sure way to kill them, dear. Take up each bug between the thumb and She said to go see for rid of forefinger, pl of wood together. “A great help, you are!” remarked Angela. “I suppose you are about to suggest that we skip around and around the nasturtiums, calling out that it’s sissie to play with flowers all day, until the bugs die of mortification.” “Oh, there are any number of ways!” Tag ¥ “This soap © it between the two blocks id then slowly press them that them,” whale oil announced catalog is good for Angela. “If it’s good for them, then it isn’t what we want. We're after something they won't like. Parsnips,” I suggested. “Well, then, here we are,” Angel: read. “‘ ‘Sprinkle the under side of each infected leaf with tobacco dust.’ ”” “Tf you expect me to go about on my hands and knees reversing each little nasturtium leaf and sprinkling it with tobacco dust—” “Paris green!” breathed Angela. “Paris green it is!’ I echoed in a whisper. ‘We'll meet behind the with- ered thorn when the moon is full, and the foul deed shall transpire. Till mi night, then!” and I tiptoed softly away. The next afternoon I announced that I had done it. They had died without a struggle, and we had our nasturtiums to ourselves again. “Of course mustn't let touch them,” warned Angela. green is deadly poison.” says we anyone “Paris lo “Poison?” I repeated blankly. how about the tomatoes—? “You didn’t put it on the tomatoes!” “Angela, I sprinkled it on ev« plant in the garden. lettuce, rhubarb, parsnips—” [broke inte smile. “Yes, I put it on the parsnips!” Still, as T told Angela, we have a nice garden to show to visitors. And we can always get fresh vegetables at the grocer’s. CR, “Then dlessed Tomatoes, parsley, Miss Nature Lover will not kill any of God’s creatures as a sacrifice to fashion. comicbooks.com