Judge — May 10, 1924 — page 24: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The Elephunnies’ Sight-seeing Bus bumped into a clumsy old elephant and the big fellow gave the NOBLESSE OBI T° MAKE a man forget a jumping tooth- ache, truly a woman must be beautiful. Beautiful was she who sat opposite me in the dental parlor. One look at her face, and the tiny but intensive inferno that vexed my incisors was, for the nonce, nonexistent. So calm was she, as she pretended to read the antediluvian Ladies Designer which rested on her knee. Had one not noticed the handkerchief she tightly pressed against her mouth, one little would have suspected that this divinity could be beset by the pesky ills of ordinary mortals. We were alone... . From within, howls of agony could be heard as Snap and Draggem plied their forceps. We wi . . Were it not for the aforesaid howls, one might have said that a holy calm pervaded Snap and Draggem’s anteroom. I took advan- tage of our mutual aloneness and the scream-punctuated calm to grasp the lady tenderly by the hand. “Madam,” I said impulsively — are beautiful! So beautiful that you hi made me oblivious of my jumping tooth- ache. I would that I were gaz you, that you too, in gazing on me be oblivious of your dental agony She whom I would make my companion in a sort of mollified misery, dropped the Ladies Designer to the floor, and quickly withdrew her hand. alone. . “you --onable as ight .” she said, her eve “you are rude, you are unconventional!” “Ts it rude,” IT queried, “to inform a benefactress of her benefaction? And as flashing fire for convention, should people stranded on a desert island permit themselves to be hampered by the artificial restraints of the drawing-room? Here are we two, little chaps the merry ha-ha. IGE stranded on a desert island of mutual pain. Why should we not comfort and console cach other, and in some measure mitigate our diabolical agonies? bold, remember, Madam, a man is not to If I seem over- be held responsible who has lain awake five nights with the jumping toothache, remember that, and forgive me!” Something in my tone seemed to strike a tender chord in the lady's bosom. A tear started to cut a channel through the powder on the left side of her dainty nose. “Poor fellow!” she condok have you had it? ~ “how long ice first L saw you!” I promptly replied. The lady with the toothache flushed. “T thought you said the sight of me rid you of your pain!” “Ah,” cried I, clutching my heart—“‘of one pain—yes! “Silly boy!” said the lady; but she smiled nevertheless. T could see she, too, had forgotten her toothache. ble as tha Again I took her hand, and patted it. She laid her head Vow isn’t wa . . « Was I really as irresisti- shoulder. I, “the patients in waiting glare and grouck another when they might be com- thus—in the hour of And there was more talk of upon it nonsensical, one forting one another their tri this sort. I don’t know how long we were seated thus: but it seemed no time at all until two final howls emanated from the in- terior, two cash registers rang out joy- ously on the pharmaceutical air, and Snap and Draggem smilingly and simultaneously made their appearance at the doors of their respective dental dens. 22 “So long panion. “See you— But before I could complete the sen- tence, Dr. Snap had grabbed the tooth- achey lady and whisked her through his open doorway. So there was nothing to do but consign myself to the eager atten- tions of Dr. Dra Isn't Fate great? We emerged, the lady the same moment. 1 * Texelaimed to my fair com- and I, almost at She was only a little 1 of me; as I stepped from Drag- 1's door, she was opening the door that led to the street. Iran up to her. I took her by the arm. T led her gently to a seat. alone... . Again we were She held a I held one She looked wan and sad. handkerchief to her mouth. to my mouth. . . I could not’ speak. My condition would not permit me. Yet I must say something. I grabbed one of Draggem’s appointment blanks, and while the room swam about me, indited my love this note Dear Lapy I cannot permit you to get You made me forget m ache. Any woman who me, deserves to marry me Will you? way from me jumping tooth- 1s that power over She took it She T handed her the note. Joy overspread her countenance. dropped her handkerchief her mouth. She smi “Yeth!” she said. Horrors, her front tooth was missing! But I was a gentleman. Noblesse oblige. I married her—knowing it would be such a comfort to the girl, to be mated to one who had also lost—a front tooth! Cyrit B. Eean. She opened comicbooks.com